this post was submitted on 31 Oct 2023
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I’ve got a lively tabletop store that has a ton of tables. It’s got stuff that interests me on multiple nights a week, and a chill regular crowd.
Then I’ve got an evening running group. Admittedly they are about to close down until next year soon.
I do admit I’m less of a night owl nowadays, and more about spending my daytime hours doing active activities. Those hours are so slambooked I am putting things in a calender organizer so I don’t doublebook my time. The nights where I’m alone I usually feel pretty beat from the daytime, and ready to just relax at home contently.
I suppose what I’m saying is that part of the blame lies on society, but some of it is learned helplessness. Making a witty Twitter post might help vent but it won’t make new social hubs fall out of the sky for you. If you’re itching to do things then go do things. Everything I’m currently into, I started out by just showing up on my own and making friends there. If you’ve got friends who only socialize by drinking at bars, don’t be shocked when the only activities seem to be bar oriented.
I agree with the gist of your post. I would add, though, that your tabletop store is a store. There is an expectation that you spend money, whether its explicit or just implied by the fact that its their space and you're taking it up. I think we need spaces where people can exist without the expectation of commerce.
People bemoan being isolated. I mentioned one of many activities as an example of how to solve being isolated.
An indoors social space to just exist would be great. Complaining about it on the internet doesn’t solve anybody’s loneliness. We can still do that of course, complaining on the internet is tradition, but we can also posit solutions that actually make people less lonely.
In my experience, people socialize more quickly with strangers when there is a shared thread in a group, rather than just an open space. Hence suggesting going and doing something rather than just going to a place. Go run, go hike, go play frisbee, find whatever meetup online thing your area has. Some of it is free, some of it you have to put some money into. But life isn’t a choice between barhopping and crippling loneliness.
The whole problem is that people don’t have the money to engage in spaces that require purchases. That’s the entire reason 3rd spaces have died. When people no longer have any disposable income they can’t go out any longer.
indeed. we need places where it costs $0 to go and socialize or organize small get togethers. anything less that free is going to make it impossible to work
You aren’t offering a solution if your solution is the problem. Incredibly condescending point of view you have there.
this is especially important nowadays, where people are poorer than they used to be, and for teens who hardly ever have any money to begin with. if you have to spend money, a lot of people couldn't afford it or will be pressured to cut back or stop going altogether when money gets tight.