this post was submitted on 31 Oct 2023
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No Stupid Questions

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Even if they did, won't they get a lot of false positives because of a large amount of it being sprayed hemp buds that are legal as hemp? Also, I know a lot of dispensaries get their stock like vape pens and such delivered this way already. How does that all work?

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[–] [email protected] 68 points 1 year ago (5 children)

For USPS they have a list of verified hemp vendors, they tried a couple years ago to open packages suspected of marijuana without a warrant. The outcome was it doesn't matter if they suspect it, you still have to get a warrant. So now if a vendor is a certified hemp vendor they can't touch it. Now UPS and FedEx are private companies so they can do pretty much whatever they want, that's why almost all hemp shipments go through USPS. I'm paraphrasing a lot but that's the gist of it. USPS is currently and has been the largest drug dealer in the country, even with omitting hemp because with the volume they process you could never catch them all and every other drug doesn't have a pungent smell like weed.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Like Mitch Hedberg used to say "I love the mail guy, he's a drug dealer and he doesn't even know it!"

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (5 children)

An escalator can never break down. It can only become stairs. The sign says "Escalator temporarily stairs. Sorry for the convenience."

Also

I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to too.

-Mitch Hedberg

Edit: Thanks for the corrections. This is what happens when drunk me makes comments.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A broken elevator is also like stairs when you're on drugs

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Nah maaaaan it's just an extra room.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Not only is it an extra room, it's an extra bathroom if you're desperate enough.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 year ago

Escalator. An elevator becomes a room when broken.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Here's two more, just for laughs:

I recently took up ice sculpting. Last night I made a cube. This morning I made 12, I was prolific.

Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus; or just a really cool Opotamus?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

That's a lot of drugs

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Well, if you're stupid enough to mail some weed or any other controlled substance via USPS Media Mail, they don't need a warrant or even Postal Inspectors to open it. As long as it is clear that the item is not media of some kind, it can be opened and documented to charge the correct postage.

Saw this before when some ding-dongs tried dumping mushroom growing kits (not exactly illegal) in the blue box at my old office. The only reason they opened them is because the fertilizer inside was causing a noticable amount of steam to come from the box (it was winter as well). All they really did was return it for proper postage because it was the wrong type.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Why would you mark your weed media mail? Mine shows up as regular first class mail. Never had an issue. It's legal in most of the US.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Save money on postage. Media Mail is cheaper than First Class/Ground Advantage or Priority Mail and still offers tracking.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

To be clear, the spores are perfectly legal. You can mail order spores that come in saline solution in a syringe without trouble. The businesses selling that are smart enough to not use media mail, which of course would cross a line (fraud). I wonder why someone would risk media mail. Perhaps they thought it would be trusted as such and thus have less scrutiny.

The nuance here is you said “kit”, which suggests everything you need for growth and thus intent. Maybe you’re right on that bit. Buying everything separately would require surveillance to put all that together that you have a kit, in effect.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

🎶"Inhale - exhale - just got an ounce in the mail"🎶

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

They can just delay your package until the warrant comes through. It doesn’t take that long.

And “we got a hit by a dog/swab” is usually accepted probable cause for opening it up

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (3 children)

They can also alert law enforcement in the shipper/receivers area to bust you when sending or collecting the package. I recall a few years ago someone sent a weed shipment and used the address of the mayor of some city in Maryland as the recipient and the police raided his house and shot his dogs.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

and shot his dogs.

bastards. It'd be funny otherwise.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Babe, wake up, someone found a new way to sic cops on people.

If it weren't for the dogs it would be funny.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Interesting lesson in this story:

Pkg with contraband was intercepted, documented, all needed warrants secured. Pkg is delivered while the house is staked out by LEOs. Sometime after delivery (a day later, iirc) they bust in, find the pkg, and arrest. The pkg was sitting just inside by the door, unopened. Defense argued “my client knows nothing about this unexpected package. Who’s to say the sender wasn’t framing the recipient?” So he obviously got vindicated.

So there’s a game of timing. Recipients need to be given the chance to open the pkg and react by calling the police. Not sure how it goes if you consume it immediately after opening and burn the box. Certainly the wrong move is to open it and let it sit around open.

/cc @[email protected]

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

A friend of mine used to ship pounds at a time through FedEx. He would ship about 20 packages every fall, half of them made it to their destination, but he and the recipients were never contacted about it. His thinking was that if someone at FedEx noticed, they would just keep it, while someone at USPS would probably get the wheels turning for prosecution.