this post was submitted on 29 Oct 2023
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Idunno, aardvarks? Other than their weird name and appearance, I don't know much about them, but I bet they're fascinating!
I don't know a lot about fantasy animals, but I can tell you that if you run into a group of five or more aardvarks at night, don't turn around. In the best case they'll mug you, worst case you'll become one of them. Lost my grandpa that way.
Aside from that they are probably based on kangaroos. You know how medieval painters were terrible at drawing lions? Modern physicists believe that two (or more) gods got really drunk, and one didn't want to admit to the other that they don't know what roos look like. It was probably really awkward.
Wait. That son of a bitch...
You know? I also quite enjoy your podcast. What can you tell me about kiwis
Thank you, thank you!
To start off, I am legally obligated to tell you that I'm not an expert in fruits, but I'll gladly try my best. Kiwis generally come in two variants, red and green - both very different in flavor and mouthfeel. Sadly there is no way to know which one you have until your first bite (since the outside coloration is the same), but that's part of the fun!
Both kinds of kiwis hunt in packs, but never intermingled. Green ones are more aerodynamic, which is why production of the red ones has been slowly phased out. Some people theorize that when God first created the world and humans, Adam actually had three balls. This put him at a great advantage compared to Eve, who only had two, so God made the third one fall off. This was the birth of the first kiwi!