this post was submitted on 28 Jun 2023
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Hey Folks!

I've been living abroad for over half my life in a country where tipping is not the norm. At most you would round up. 19โ‚ฌ bill? Here's a 20, keep this change.

Going to the US soon to visit family and the whole idea of tipping makes me nervous. It seems there's a lot of discussion about getting rid of tipping, but I don't know how much has changed in this regard.

The system seems ridiculously unfair, and that extra expense in a country where everything is already so expensive really makes a difference.

So will AITA if I don't tip? Is it really my personal responsibility to make sure my server is paid enough?

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[โ€“] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago (2 children)

A tip less than $4.81 means you expect the driver to earn less than minimum wage.

I disagree - it means you expect them to earn a wage regardless of how much you tip. Bosses should pay their workers a living wage, period. DD drivers shouldn't have to rely on the kindness of strangers.

[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I disagree - it means you expect them to earn a wage regardless of how much you tip. Bosses should pay their workers a living wage, period. DD drivers shouldnโ€™t have to rely on the kindness of strangers.

I agree, but if you pay for a service knowing that worker is underpaid by the boss, you are exploiting the worker just as much as the boss is.

The system is broken, it's unethical to exploit the broken for your own advantage as well.

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (2 children)

You don't exploit by paying the price that was agreed on. The driver let's himself be exploited, but that is not the fault of the customer. If I agree to give away 100 $ bills I don't get exploited by people taking them.

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

The price that was agreed upon includes the assumption of tips as it's currently apart of the social contract in these countries, like it or not. You're allowed to hate the system, shit I'm sure drivers and servers hate the system and would much prefer to make a risk-free living wage, but if you refuse to participate and by doing so fuck over the lowest paid workers in those countries you are 100% an asshole. You aren't fighting some big evil social injustice, you're just an asshole.

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

You don't exploit by paying the price that was agreed on.

How is this relevant?

An agreement with the owner that is exploiting the laborer is absolutely exploiting the laborer.

The people who bought slaves for the agreed upon price from the master are also guilty of slavery.

It's a very painful and difficult truth than participating in the broken system is enabling the broken system.

The driver let's himself be exploited

You mean that being exploited is marginally better than being homeless.

[โ€“] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Some people genuinely don't realize the delivery person doesn't get paid much. I didn't even know for the longest time that the "delivery fee" apparently does not go to the driver. That's an issue with DoorDash and similar apps' messaging to the users. My tips have gone up since I learned that the delivery fee is apparently not for the delivery person. It's not always malice on the customer's part though. Sometimes it's genuine misunderstanding.

[โ€“] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

No, they don't rely on the "kindness" of strangers, in these countries tipping is a social norm, not a kindness, so they're actually relying on strangers to just not being complete assholes. The system is lame as hell and most people agree, but if you take that out on the lowest paid members of society you're just a douchebag.