this post was submitted on 21 Sep 2023
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If you choose to talk about something to someone that they don't necessarily care about, the whole subtext is sharing how you're feeling, right?
Ok I didn't phrase that very well. What I don't like is how I listen to people's shit and am patient with them, even if I'm not necessarily interested in the topic, yet other people wouldn't do the same for me.
Is it not a basic human decency thing to do?
I'll answer because I think I'm the only one awake. If you listen to their drivel and they don't listen to your drivel then they are narcissistic cunts. Full stop.
🤷♀️ Drivel is where the real conversation happens.
I excel at drivel
twins
(catching up) Triplets!
Wow, I honestly thought that I was just a super patient person with people and that what I had to say was stupid or didn't matter.
You are obviously a patient person but you're not stupid and what you have to say does matter it's just that some people are so self absorbed that they just don't care. It's not you it's them.
I agree with Ceo.
You are super patient with listening to people and what you say is valid, it’s just that the other party aren’t patient enough to listen to you which isn’t fair.
It's also possible the other party are the stupid ones and they don't understand what Low is trying to get across
Yup. Also a possible too
I’ll chime in too.
It would be pretty selfish of them if you were to listen to them and they wouldn’t want to listen to you because it doesn’t interest them.
It would be a decent thing to do for other people if you had to do it but not everyone’s decent about it.
Seems few people have the ability or wish to put up with any mildly uncomfortable feelings or situations.
For many decency isn't even something they think about if they are going to be mildly put out in any way.
And not everyone has the kindness or the patience .
So a bit of philosophy is that when helping someone it's meant to be done without debt, other wise you're not really helping you're just doing business. - A few stoics have this view.
However if your friends are simply taking when they need and never giving when you need, that is probably something worth addressing as it'll eat at the friendship. It's certainly eaten away at a bunch of my relationships over the years. I feel I spent my 20/30s trying to be a helpful compassionate person, but if I try to put that on a balance, people helped themselves to my helpfulness and compassion. When I had problems - depression, car accident, back injury, eviction, medical complications - I didn't hear from anybody. After all that I stopped trying to help people, I stopped working as a therapist, I gave up on people. After A FEW YEARS I started to get the occasional low-effort text message about missing me. It didn't make me feel like resuming my efforts as a useful person. It felt like they missed my efforts and not my person hood.
And on talking drivel: “Talking nonsense is the sole privilege mankind possesses over the other organisms. It's by talking nonsense that one gets to the truth! I talk nonsense, therefore I'm human” - Fyodor Dostoevsky.