this post was submitted on 27 Apr 2025
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God this is true, there's a staggering amount of people that lack it. So much selfishness as well
I lost most of mine during Covid. The amount of selfishness by people during that time has made me want to never be empathetic towards them... and there were A LOT of selfish people.
I have to confess I lost all empathy for people in the west over COVID for a while. While we were being hit with the heaviest and largest quarantine in history, cowering down in terror in our apartments, I kept one thought in my head in the first two weeks: "We're suffering so the rest of the world has time to prepare and fight back."
Then all y'all didn't prepare. Didn't fight back. Instead broke quarantine restrictions because you needed a fucking haircut.
I mean even ignoring the clown-pants-wearing CDC, the sheer utter shitfuckery of the average person freaking out because they had to wear a couple of fucking grams of paper over their mouth and nose, squealing like stuck pigs and generally acting like entitled shitheads over it, not to mention the people who not only broke quarantine, but fucking bragged about it on social media (like the bridal shower that turned into a massive cluster of cases), just had me gobsmacked in disbelief.
So when Wuhan opened up again and people did things like celebrate with a massive pool party that sent shockwaves of (typical) hatred at the Chinese around the world for daring to celebrate after living through the worst quarantine in history and coming out whole, I decided all y'all chucklefucks could die for all I gave a shit about.
Took me a few years to shove that rage back down and clamp it into a red-hot ball deep in my heart.
Now I feel sorry for people suffering again.
Except Trump supporters suffering at the hands of his idiot policies, I mean.
Selfishness can be trained away, lack of empathy not very much it seems.
Happily we store all these non-empats in position of power.
I think empathy can be trained. Children in general (I mean very young children) have no empathy. They're vicious little sociopaths. But if they're gently introduced to empathy as they grow, by the time they're, like, 5 they will have empathy. (Those who were not taught to be empathic by 5 will never be able to develop it.
coughMuskcough coughTrumpcough
But you can lose empathy over time. Trauma can make you lose empathy. Fury (c.f. my above rant about COVID-19) can make you lose empathy. Tragedy can make you lose empathy. THAT kind of empathy loss, however, can be re-learned. It's not even all that hard. The world just has to stop beating up on you a while, or you just have to meet someone who has it worse than you do to snap back.
Well yes that was what I was meaning, if you don't have empathy as an adult it seems it's impossible to acquire.
Yeah, it seems you need a baseline instilled into you at critical junctures of your upbringing to have it at all. After that it can be trained, in effect, but only if you have it to begin with.
It's akin to a skill, after all. Like humor. Having either one does not make someone good or bad. They're just gimmicks in the end.