this post was submitted on 10 Feb 2025
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And Finally...

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With Dry January well and truly over, the Church of England has taken the opportunity to proclaim that alcohol-free wine can’t be used for holy communion.

The Church’s governing body slapped down proposals for non-alcoholic wine and also gluten-free bread to be allowed during the ritual.

Instead, an Anglican leader insisted communion bread had to come from wheat flour and wine from the fermented juice of grapes.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Odd. Given miraculous nature of transubstantiation they could use any liquid for communion, surely? Like, water, or petrol, or tippex.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Lighter fluid, for the discerning gentleman.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

"... a far superior drink to meths. The wankers don't drink it because they can't afford it."

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

Or any bodily fluid, or at least that’s what the priests told me.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

That would be an ecumenical matter.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago

It is supposed to turn into the blood of a 2000year dead man. Pretty sure mixing alcohol is a minimum safty requirement.