Technology

I am absolutely not the one making it sound like a complex thing haha you're the one who brought up pregnancy as though that's how we determine how to gender someone.

Perfect, so you agree that how someone looks to you is how you gender them. It isn't their ability to reproduce, it isn't their chromosomes, it isn't their genitalia, it's how they look. Like someone might be wearing clothes considered feminine in your culture, they might be wearing makeup or have visible breasts or a frame or facial structure associated with femininity in your culture. They might carry themselves in a way considered feminine by your culture, have a voice in a higher range or speak in a cadence and tone associated with femininity by your culture.

You would be inclined to gender that person a woman and use pronouns she and her for them. Pretty simple right, you've seen girls your whole life you know what they look like. You know how they talk how they move what they wear. Same with boys. You know the way boys look and how they move and talk, what clothes they wear, how their hair is cut, how they're built and what their faces look like.

But you'll note that none of these things are hard-line biological rules. Women are still women without breasts, with deep voices, with squarer builds and heavier facial structures. Women are still women with facial hair from PCOS. Womanhood is not something determined by biology. Otherwise, you'd ask for concrete proof every single time you had to refer to someone. It also exists whether or not someone completely matches what you expect women to look like or not. And if you gender a cisgender person wrong, if you call a girl a boy, she can correct you, and you will apologize and refer to her as a girl. She looked like a boy to you from that angle, but you were wrong.

Gender is a social class. It is how we treat people socially. It defines certain rules and conventions for how you think about someone and how you interact with them. Transgender rights is liberating people to determine what their own gender is. It's allowing gender identity to be self determined instead of assumed by other people. It's pointing out, correctly, that gender is not defined by biology. It is defined by convention by what other people call you. That men and women are not biologically hardwired towards gender. Dresses are not a part of women's biology, nor long hair, nor push-up bras. Those things are culturally and socially determined. Assigned gender is defined by restriction, boys can't do that girls can't do this. Liberating people from assigned gender allows them to define who they are.

In short, gender is something you assign by what you see. What you see can be wrong. And when it's wrong you trust the person speaking when they correct you (unless you're an asshole). This has always applied to cis people. But it is restrictive, it forces people to be and act a certain way even if they don't want to. And it doesn't have to be that way. Your gender should be up to you. Everyone's should be.