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So if a guy talks plainly and non-aggressively, like a normal and rational person with no insensitive comments or uncomfortable flirting... They can't be friends? I guess that's my confusion. I remember the world when I grew up being a bit more simple.
Not when all your other mates all tried the same thing, then flipped completely.
The world when you grew up was filled with men doing this exact thing, the concept of the friend zone has been around forever and even before that, women didn't really have a choice.
Plenty of men who didn't take no for an answer, and wore down the woman until they said yes.
They can, once the two meet. But the women are often in situations where nine other men have seemed to be doing that, then got creepy. So for their safety they don't engage.