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Advice request: How do I stop venting to people? (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

11 comments fedilink hide all child comments

When I'm frustrated or anxious or upset, I vent to the few friends I have. This is a negative coping mechanism as it damages our relationships. I also experience extreme remorse after doing so, which further perpetuates it because I'm constantly asking to be forgiven.

Earlier this year I tried to see a therapist and ask for advice on this. She dismissed me and said that it's ok to do that and you can't simply keep everything inside.

She was incorrect and was also a shitty therapist for various reasons (she was 15-30 minutes late to each session and just dismissed anything I said).

I'm hopefully trying again with a new therapist soon, but I need advice in the meantime. It is actively damaging my relationships.

"Journaling" is not an option because I can't stop what I'm doing at work to go journal something whenever the need arises.

Thanks all. I can delete on request if needed.

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 days ago (1 children)

"Journaling" is not an option because I can't stop what I'm doing at work to go journal something whenever the need arises.

I don't quite understand this point. Do you stop what your doing at work in order to vent to your friends?

If not,it seems like you could wait until after work to journal.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

I work with my one and only IRL friend. The other friends are online. So I vent to my IRL friend while we are working.

Plus it doesn't seem to help me anyway.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Oh okay.

Well, I don't know the answer. Sounds like you're going to have to find some way to internalize the feelings and engage some coping mechanisms, so that you can file it away emotionally.

Maybe some breathing exercises, or taking a brief moment to meditate quietly in your chair. Or talk it out with your internal voice, which I think is what I do.