this post was submitted on 30 Sep 2024
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So tonight I'm going to an event that I have never been to before; a poetry reading at a local pub by a modern author. They have an open mic as well, but I am not even close to confident enough to consider that.
But I do consider this my first step towards the culture and being a part of a community, after dabbling so long with prose and only reading poetry books since I was a small child. I think my first book, that I can remember, is one I still have: a book of Childrens Poetry (Lewis carrol, William Blake, etc) that contributed heavily to my love of the artform.
I have no idea why I feel so anxious and nervous, or why I want to back out. I guess avoidance and the fear I'll make a fool of myself, despite not performing at all. Idk, I hope I can find a welcoming community within that space, but even if I don't, I'll still write. I don't think I could stop writing, even if I wanted to.
I know people that have been active in the poetry and spoken word scene. I can get going to something for the first time can feel daunting, but you'll be surprised how welcoming everyone is. You might find a place with a crowd you gel with and maybe you might even go up and read something.
One thing I noticed from doing standup is the bar is so, incredibly, low, and people are supportive of anyone giving things an earnest shot.
we love your work and iโd attend and clap very loudly had i not have work
I've done open mics, storytelling, and I can agree that mostly the crowd is welcoming. You may get a few self-absorbed shits that are only there for the strokes, and these can usually be ignored. Which really pisses them off so is worth doing on those grounds alone. Consider using a nom de guerre - at least at first. It's an effective way to manage the feeling of threat to one's personal identity. A 'poetry name' is very traditional so I think you are in good company if you choose to use one.
I never performed, just lurked. Maybe do that until your nervousness goes
So many hugs.
May I suggest practising speaking out loud at home. Maybe even record yourself. Think before hand what rhythm you want and which words you will emphasise.
Nice work! That's a good way to ease into things. Have fun, don't put any pressure on yourself.