this post was submitted on 29 Sep 2024
744 points (97.6% liked)

196

16357 readers
2319 users here now

Be sure to follow the rule before you head out.

Rule: You must post before you leave.

^other^ ^rules^

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

If you need a bottle opener to open a bottle you aren't alcoholic

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

REAL MAN OPEN THEIR BOTTLE WITH THEIR TEETH

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

I usually just stick it in my ass and use my expertly trained clenched sphincter to open the bottle, like a real man.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

So uh... the pair of channel locks I keep on my coffee table... Am I poor or an alcoholic?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

For starters, you don't own a very fancy coffee table.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Sorry I should have clarified. I refer to the trunk thats in front of my couch that has shit on and in it as a coffee table

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

Oh well in that case, at least the couch is fancy. Jorkin Dapeenits has discerning tastes.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

Doesn't matter if you're sober, or even a man. It's wise to have a coffee table suitable for storing your channel locks. If you have a spouse it's more wise to listen them.