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You'd hate me then. I'm a software developer who did IT support for a couple years, so if I'm calling, it's because I've exhausted all of the common problems.

BTW, shibboleet.

My internet goes out a few times per year. I run entry-level enterprise hardware (Ubiquiti APs + Mikrotik router), and I'll do a full power cycle (power off, wait 30s, plug back in, etc) before calling in. I'll have detailed diagnostics (e.g. can I ping the gateway, but not 1.1.1.1? traceroute logs saying exactly where my connection is failing, etc), and I'll submit them through their online form entry before calling.

I've only gotten through their phone support once or twice. I think they recognize the number and just dispatch a team pre-emptively, because my internet is usually fixed within 10 min of sending that in (and I've waited up to an hour before). It's a small ISP that only serves my small town (30-40k people), and they don't have a monopoly, so I'm one of probably a few thousand customers and they probably only have one or two phone support people.

I've had one time when it was something I could fix (was a faulty cable), but every other time it's been some kind of service disruption on their end.