this post was submitted on 23 Jun 2024
6 points (53.4% liked)
Asklemmy
43857 readers
1641 users here now
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
Search asklemmy ๐
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- [email protected]: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
For your own mental health, try to avoid assuming all women feel the same, it dehumanizes them which prevents you from having empathy and thus creating meaningful connections because you are assuming a woman's feelings before ever knowing her.
A lot of women feel the same way you do, trust me. A lot of women don't know what they want, or just want something as simple as somebody that they enjoy spending time with. That's it. Try not to overcomplicate it. Ask them what they want before you sabotage connections.
Dude I've being ignored enough. I won't ask anything, is obvious what they want from a man. Be honest would you date me? Make love to me? No, right? I bet you're thinking I'm pathetic. Well this is me.
I wouldn't, not because you are unsuccessful, but because you hate yourself.
When I met my partner of 10 years, he had no money, i had barely any. We drank king cans by the river and smoked weed for our first date. In fact, I dated so many guys that were hardly conventionally attractive, money or success weren't things I considered. The only things I considered were how I felt around them. You would be surprised what kind of things women find attractive.
You really are just making huge leaps and assumptions because you don't want to have to turn your whole world upside down, because that would mean admitting you have been wrong for so long and miserable for no reason. It would mean having to dissect your own ego.
You clearly don't want to be happy, because if you did, you wouldn't be arguing against advice you asked for. Women don't want to date you because you don't want them to want to date you, because that would mean you're wrong, so you actively push them away by doing things like this.
This is pure blackpill. I'm really sorry you are in this position, but you truly need to talk this over with a therapist. You're not unlovable, but when you think and talk like this women, rightfully, see nothing but red flags. And then your loneliness become a self fulfilling prophecy.
There is nothing wrong with you, except for the fact that you believe everything is wrong with you. A relationship is literally the last thing you need, instead focus on your own mental health and serenity.
This thread is a form of self harm. I know therapy is hard, but arguging with strangers about how terrible you are won't ever make things better. Tending to your mental health will.