this post was submitted on 14 Jun 2024
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[–] [email protected] 135 points 6 months ago (1 children)

No reasons to be concerned, citizen. The former head of the largest surveillance agency in the world just joined as a C-level member to the largest data scraping company in the world

[–] [email protected] 44 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Ok that makes sense. I don't like this.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 6 months ago (2 children)

You will tell the AI all of your most private thoughts and feelings. The AI will be your closest friend, lover, and confidant.

If you refuse to let the AI know everything about you, you will be considered a terrorist pedophile... a TERROR-PEDO!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)

How dare you have secrets? What are you hiding there? Why are you trying to have privacy? How dare you?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

Remain calm. Assume the position. Your patience is appreciated. A legally authorized operative will be with you shortly. Stop resisting. Or else it gets the hose again.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago

Remember that Friend Computer loves you. Returning that love TO Friend Computer is MANDATORY, and failure to comply will be considered treason and thus grounds for IMMEDIATE TERMINATION. Thank you citizen and have a mandatorily happy day!