this post was submitted on 07 Jun 2024
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I only drink a couple times per year. I'm typically pretty introverted and quiet, but once I've had alcohol, people keep telling me that I'm so friendly and fun and how they'd like to have some drinks with me again.
Dangerous.
Thankfully, I hate how bloated and disgusting I feel when I drink, otherwise I'd probably be an alcoholic like my mom, who died of alcohol poisoning after being the life of the party for years until it got so bad she wasn't fun anymore.
Shit is bleak out there, no one gives a shit if you have a drinking problem because it's so normalized. Then when you need help and are pushing everyone away, there's barely any support unless you have money. And AA programs have their own issues.
I've had people bring up my completely legal, never-abused, responsibly used, doctor-prescribed medication out of "concern", while my then-partner would down a couple 40s before noon and no one would fucking bat an eye.
Shit's fucked. Alcoholism is so normalized and socially accepted that folks just treat it like a fun quirk.
My family has a history of the bad kind of alcoholism, so I didn't even try alcohol until my mid-twenties.
I was very introverted at the time, and I have to admit, I loved the person I was when I was drunk.
Fortunately for me, I had the willpower and the awareness to realize that just because I liked it didn't mean I needed more. For about 10 years, I drank socially, in moderation, maybe about once a month on average.
I'll admit it did get a bit dicey in University, where I had a drink most days with my friends after class, but I very quickly dropped that habit after graduating.
Not that it's relevant (is any of this story?), but I recently discovered I have an issue with my liver - presumably not alcohol related - and as a precaution I've just stopped drinking entirely. Fortunately I'm a lot more "extroverted" these days, but I'll admit I do miss it sometimes.
Mine has a history of un-fun alcoholism, as well. Apparently it was used to self-medicate our other family history of depression. 🎉
I'd drink more if I had folks to go out with, but I've cut off a lotta people in the last few years.
It seems that social pressure to drink kind of doesn't go away as you age, huh?
Honestly, since weed was legalized here, my entire social group pretty much entirely ditched alcohol in favor of cannabis. Definitely makes it easier for me to not feel pressured to drink, thankfully.
Yeah for introverts the options in life are basically forever alone, or learn how to use alcohol responsibly. Or irresponsibly if that's your thing. I go back and forth.
I've learned to be okay with alone-ness. Not sure that self-destruction is the better route, tbh.