Maybe you could refresh my memory with an episode or some more details because I don't remember it that way. I remember Adira stating their pronouns, everyone accepting that and using those pronouns and never mentioning it again. I'm pretty damn sure there wasn't some Jordan Peterson type that refused to get with the program.
I'm also pretty sure there wasn't any focus on Stamets' and Culber's "gay" relationship. Their relationship was part of several story elements but the gay aspect was not. Please remind me of any plots involving their relationship that would have to be changed if one of them was a woman.
You are the one making a big deal about these characters because you can't get over their simple existence.
Respectfully, no, I'm not going to "try to be less judgemental."
I see a show that continues it's long tradition of inclusiveness and respect for all people by including characters that are sexual and gender minorities. I then see people who claim to be fans, not just of the show, but also of what it has always been trying to do, complaining about it doing what it's always done.
I'm going to judge. I have judged, and I've found you wanting.