this post was submitted on 08 Nov 2023
454 points (99.6% liked)

Terrible Estate Agent Photos

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Terrible photos listed by estate agents/realtors that are so bad they’re funny.

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[–] [email protected] 60 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Wake up -> wash face, brush teeth -> piss -> shower -> (optional: smoke) -> 180 turn -> take a dump -> wash hands. No time wasted, optimal morning routine bathroom.

[–] [email protected] 64 points 10 months ago (3 children)

You take a shit after you shower instead of before? You filthy animal.

Shit shower shave

[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)

With a bit of extra thought, you'd have been able to do all three at the same time here. A real missed opportunity.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

The classic waffle stomp, how could I forget

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I shave before the shower because my skin gets rubbery and then do touchup after. :(

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I have to shit 3-5 times a day, so it's irrelevant.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

You might want to get that checked out if you haven't already... Or at least rethink your diet.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

I've gotten myself checked multiple times and it's always the same result. IBS is such a bitch.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago

Smoke before taking a dump?

Shaking my smh

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 10 months ago (3 children)

I hate that toilet. There's no little shelf for your comic book or to play army men on while you go.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 10 months ago

Where are you supposed to put your chocolate milk????

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

How does it even flush without a tank on the back?

[–] [email protected] 19 points 10 months ago (2 children)

You see that big ass block high up on the wall? That's the tank for flushing. It's connected to the toilet through that pipe

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago

Would suck to have to change the flapper in that contraption..

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

Wow what the fuck. That takes this to a whole new level for me.

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[–] [email protected] 37 points 10 months ago

Any man who can shit with his back exposed is a braver man than I

[–] [email protected] 17 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Nightmare question, but did they just tie the toilet into the existing floor drain?!?!?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Nope there's a four inch line coming down from the upstairs neighbor, he likely has a similar time bomb for the guy below him.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

It's human centipede: high rise apartment edition

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Why? You could just orient it the other way and it would be fine.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago (3 children)

It's so you can be sick in the sink.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago (1 children)

A little bit closer and you can shit, shower, and shave all at the same time.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

It's doable just... messy.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

Having been in a few Turkish toilets with questionable sink/toilet proximity/orientation whilst unsure which end was going to go next, I have appreciated such convenient conveniences.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Idk who in the world pukes into the sink. Seems like you're risking a clog that is going to suck to fix. Pro tip: keep a trash can in your bathroom in the event you need to shit and puke at the same time. Then just dump the puke into the toilet.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

A poo with a view πŸ‘Œ

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Only if you sit on the toilet backwards like some sort of animal.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Dude where else do I put my comic book while pooping?

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Honestly, rotating the toilet 90Β° would make this good. I learned that it has advantages being able to lean your head against the wall while shitting. Having salmonella a very small apartment in Tokyo made me appreciate that convenience.πŸ˜†

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Then you'd have to jump over the toilet to get to the shower.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

I'd take that over the awkward shuffle around it tbh

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

In took me a while to understand that "salmonella" wasn't a typo/autocorrect thing.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 10 months ago (3 children)

This is a super common bathroom layout in Hamburg. 1 out of 3 apartments has this.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago

With this toilet placement?!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

I've seen it with the toilet close to the wall. Wouldn't say its the badest of the bad real estate, but the toilet placement is a lil bit weird.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago

it's like: "- hey, we forgot to build a bathroom! - No worries, I have an idea."

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Just missing the bidet for the full French effect

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Step over the toilet to get to the bidet. Step over the bidet to get to the shower.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

🎢 A fresh coat of paint, can hide the mould away 🎢

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

That big waste pipe suggests the floor above may have jankier arrangements again.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

Thought this didn't look too bad until I saw the toilet

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

mine is really narrow like this, but the back of the toilet is on a 'long' wall, so it 'sticks out' instead. meaning you cannot sit straight on it without your knees hitting the wall. you have to step over it to get to the shower. and no window, or fan--or heat for that matter, either.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (4 children)

That looks like a bathroom from a building around 1880-1910 that I have seen several times in GrΓΌnderzeit buildings in Germany

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Heyyy idid my bathroom the same and it actually looks ok if you have the curtain behind the toilet

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

With the wrong hangover you know someone's gonna take that toilet out when trying to get around it / forgetting it's there

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