this post was submitted on 27 Sep 2023
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Mental Health

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The evening was going well until a person 15 years younger than me started talking to me about his 2-year-old son. And I think of my life, alone and miserable playing the loser.

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago

Kids are not a definition of success. So many people are not fit to be parents and only realize it after it's too late and have major regret.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Children are people, not status symbols for their parents.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago

Also, they're not a requirement for happiness. In fact, I can guarantee my life will be happier without them.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Man, I feel you. I try not to compare myself to other people and their lives but I still get jealous and envious. Especially when someone younger is doing so much better than me. I highly encourage you to dream about what you can still do and not what you could have. You can't change the past but you can still steer the ship I guess.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Sons don't stay forever with their parents. Eventually his son would leave him and establish a family elsewhere with occasional visits from time to time.

Joining a community would be the solution for loneliness but also can consider pets in addition or you could go as far as adopting a son if u can't have one

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

At least in the professional field, what I've seen is that anyone younger than you working on the same thing is already more successful than you.

Previously I used to feel bad about it, but now that I have accepted it, I feel happy that I made it there late rather than never. And it makes me want to improve to the point that I'll be the youngest one in the room with other peers.

Regarding parenthood I can't say much, but it definitely isn't a measure of success.