this post was submitted on 12 Sep 2023
749 points (94.3% liked)

Memes

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[–] [email protected] 64 points 1 year ago (7 children)

Y'all need more fiber in ya life

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My toilet paper is already practically a pillow, how many more fibers do you want?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It has to go through you!!!

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Instructions unclear, i ate all the toilet paper.

Wish I hadn’t used it first.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Well at least it's recyclable.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I have IBS. Might as well ask us if we've tried yoga.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

FYI, 'have you tried yoga?' In chronic illness speak means 'can I offer you unsolicited advice with the undertones of presuming that you have not tried to the best of your abilities to cure yourself of an incurable disease that has not even come close to be fully treatable?'

Not saying that's what OP said, just saying thats how it comes off to most non-chronic illness sufferers.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Ok, but have you tried essential oils?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Also water. If you eat a bunch of fiber without water... believe it or not, also constipation.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (2 children)

No, he needs a squatty potty. I can’t believe nobody else in these comments has mentioned them.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Fuck, I forgot what a cult following those weird things have.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

And how do you deal with corn then? 🌽

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Wash it off and toss it in the next pot of chili!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Corn? I don't remember eating corn!

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I don't think that's going to help the lactose intolerance and potential IBS.

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 year ago (9 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

That's right, show that turd who's boss!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Yeah, that's it! You show that turd who's boss.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (4 children)

(since nobody seems to know, this is a scene from the Prisoner, which is what "who does #2 work for" is a reference to)

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure this is a reference to Austin Powers, where he's giving the Irish hitman a swirly in a casino bathroom and yelling "WHO DOES NUMBER 2 WORK FOR" while a gambler played by Tom Arnold in the next stall is trying to encourage him on.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You are correct. But what Austin Powers was referencing was this scene from The Prisoner. Top notch 60's TV!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

The mvp is in the comments of the comments

[–] foo 6 points 1 year ago

That's not my bag, baby

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

I AM NOT A NUMBER. I AM A FREE MAN!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Deep cut! I first heard of and saw that show in college. It's great!

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 year ago (1 children)

When you take your pants off mid-shit, you know it’s a life or death situation

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago

Or when you preemptively take off your shirt.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Wait a sec... Is it me or did he forget to open the lid on the toilet?

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago

That's the fighting part

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

That's just the seat.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's why we call it bathroom.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Speak for yourself.

I call it Badezimmer but for similar reasons

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

I am convinced that of all the secrets of the world that the elder generations hadn’t passed onto us…taking a fiber supplement is the biggest improvement to daily life.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

True. Went to a farmers market and bought a bunch cuz they were cheap. Stupid ass me decided to eat then and there. Thirty minutes later I was blowing red lights to try to reach a safe place to drop der UberDeuce. I swore that the toilet was screaming at me for a week after that

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Yeah, bananas help solidify it. They are also mildly antacid. I'll take that over fighting for my life after enjoying a tasty hot sauce!

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Can confirm. Have Crohn's.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

Can confirm. Have Crohn's, and I just stopped at home in the middle of my route because I couldn't hold it anymore...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Yeah, I have celiac and all I think when people reference epic toilet struggles is “hmm, either you don’t eat any fiber or… you may have a serious health problem”

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

I once was really tired in a mall and went to the (public) toilet just to sit my ass down and hide from people.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Im in this exact position while reading this.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

I’ve had about three number twos in my life where I’ve literally started to feel faint, sweating profusely, and expelling non-solid matter.

It could be fibre or it could be all the pain meds I was abusing, suffice to say it’s not fun.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Because you won't eat your fresh veg.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Take the corn OFF the cob next time dumbass

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Oh that's exactly my position the morning after a "Hot ones" evening!

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