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A collection of some classic Lemmy memes for your enjoyment
cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/26300715
Get a grip, pug. Just accept it and move on…
Blahaj has Blahaj rules - don’t like them, then don’t comment and/or visit.
Every instance has rules - you’ll never agree with all of them; but isn’t that the entire point of federation, i.e. decentralisation?
Blahaj has Blahaj rules - don’t like them, then don’t comment and/or visit.
This meme is explicitly referencing an incident that happened entirely off of Blahaj in which Blahaj stans harassed a trans user into leaving the Fediverse.
Yea, it’s like going to a christian household for dinner and eating before grace. They don’t expect you to participate in the prayer but the least you can do is not start eating before they’re ready in their own home. And if they do a little grace for themselves while at your house you leave them alone. Sure it’s a little weird to sit their with a bowed head while they leave their magic diety a voicemail but it’s not harmful and they aren’t asking you to convert in order to eat supper.
The same can be said for being even vaguely accommodating for a vegan friend who’s visiting and not making them feel like they aren’t allowed to eat. They won’t stop you eating meat and the least you can do is make sure that forks for meat and vegetables remain separate.
Yea, it’s like going to a christian household for dinner and eating before grace. They don’t expect you to participate in the prayer but the least you can do is not start eating before they’re ready in their own home
Again, as stated in the meme, all of this happened on an ENTIRELY DIFFERENT INSTANCE, and Blahaj felt the need to intervene.
Sure it’s a little weird to sit their with a bowed head while they leave their magic diety a voicemail but it’s not harmful and they aren’t asking you to convert in order to eat supper.
They drove someone off for daring to have Wrongthink. Kind of sounds like they are asking to convert to eat supper - even at another table.
I understand that transphobic people exist online.
We also need to recognize that being trans doesn't mean that you're incapable of being an asshole, engaging in cyberharassment or any other negative social behaviors that all people are capable of.
Much like OP, I've been attacked by these people for supporting trans people in a way that wasn't popular (I.e. not brigading Twitch streamers and harassing children playing Legacy of Hogwarts). I saw a user banned for saying to donate to the Trevor Project instead of brigading and I spoke up in support of them.
I was banned for "transphobia".
There are absolutely mods/admins using their power in trans social spaces to attack and purge people for no reason other than that they're not fully aligned with whatever dogma the mod feels is correct.
I just don't even try to interact anymore. There will always be some chronically online commenter or mod who wants to try to deconstruct your every word choice looking for an angle to accuse you of saying something outrageous.
Alienating allies and bullying people out of the community is toxic and wrong, regardless of your being a member of a minority group.
I have several trans friends these days and two of them were friends all the way back in highschool, in a different city. They’ve recently found themselves distant from one another because there is a clash in ideologies.
One lays lower, goes about their business, and goes to queer events and all that stuff, though they’re still out there visibly trans. The other is very much an activist and will straight up yell at people on the street, I hear, and protests they organize have had at least one physical clash, to my knowledge. I can’t blame either of them, really, for the caution in these volatile times or the aggression when they’re pretty much the only group of people reliably standing up for their rights. The specific issue that came up was a whole thing, but suffice it to say there was a disagreement on tactics similar to what you mentioned.
Ultimately I think the no interaction thing is not a bad play. Allies or no, we aren’t them and while some communication is good sometimes it’s important to be reminded that we’ve entered someone else’s space. Not only someone else’s space, but space belonging to people who are constantly harrassed and feeling cornered just by existing and who will understably defend what little they do have with a maybe…overzealous approach. By the stories here are they handling it well? God no, that sounds wild, but my point still stands.
It goes for any margainalized group, I suppose, that by nature of being pushed aside one lives in a world where they must speak multiple “languages” and learn about how to live in more than one way. They end up generally being better people for it, but that doesn’t at all mean that every single one is better. For all the supportive, kind, and otherwise chill trans people there are still a very small handful who do things like forget who their allies are or even who go way off the deep-end and support the GOP or whatever equalivalent in their country.
I understand why it exists in online spaces, at the same time it's on every person to speak up against bad behavior.
I didn't magically become transphobic because someone was an asshole to me and I can empathize with what caused the behavior.
These kinds of reactions are still wrong and is harmful on both the individual level and to the community writ large. Because of that, people should not feel pressured to accept bad behavior or blamed for not walking on egg shells.
We all have the right to be treated with respect and dignity.
It’s true that we all deserve to be treated with respect and dignity but we equally have understand how much easier that is for one group compared to the other. Us cis people have all the power, and trans people are basically forced to exist in a constant state of fight-or-flight.
I remember the kind of person I allowed myself to become when I spent 40hrs a week at a job that didn’t value me. I was overly defensive even outside of work, and my self-esteem was already crappy enough, and this led to judging others too harshly as well. I didn’t even have space to fully recognize that my now ex-girlfriend really did care for me and didn’t have the patience to realize that she was going through exactly the same shit. And that was just my job! Imagine if nearly every waking moment made you constantly ready for a confrontation.
I was ultimately let go because I “wasn’t a good fit”. What really happened was that people with more power than me were mad that I didn’t kiss the ring. I wasn’t mean, but I made the mistake of thinking these people were different because on the face of it they really did seem better. I thought it was safe to talk to them about pay and they led with gaslighting me and trying to devalue me, and any attempt to push back was “rude” and they had the gall to say “I don’t know why you feel you can’t talk to us about stuff”.
Now bring that into this space and you can see how unbalanced everything is. Of course we feel safe around them, we have all the power, and we have to understand that it’s not the same in the other direction. Just being trusted enough to be allowed to be present is a fucking honour we should be proud of.
I got called transphobe yesterday for pointing out that most mobile apps don't show display names or profile pictures, meaning the person they replied to wouldn't have had the same information they have.
They went a dozen comments deep with multiple users, screaming transphobe at every single person who disagreed with them.
Some people really need a bit of perspective on the situation.
I think I saw that exchange yesterday. Was it the person that absolutely freaked out over another user being called a male term? (I can't remember exactly what it was, I want to say "son" but I don't think that was it). I use Voyager and I don't see profile pictures or even any descriptions on people's profiles. I didn't even know that existed until that person was freaking out and calling everyone transphobes for not knowing.
That's the one.
Sometimes I just don't understand human behavior.
See, that's the thing. That's not normal human behaviour. That's disgusting antisocial trash. They're exactly like the MAGA clowns just on the other end of the spectrum.
Touché. I've grown exhausted of people becoming so unhinged on the internet. I haven't been on Lemmy long and was thinking most people seemed normal so far... But I guess you're always going to end up coming across unhinged people eventually.
I think breaking peoples profiles is just a Voyager thing
(works fine on Eternity, Jerboa and Racoon)
Looks like they work on Thunder, just disabled by default
I use Boost.
I probably can enable display names and profile pics, but it's mostly just clutter.
I'll most likely be banned for this, but I guess they can support attack helicopters if they want. I just thought we were done with that joke over a decade ago, but it apparently only changed flavors.
They tried again with a drone themed username, and claiming the neopronoun "droneself"
I haven't seen anything from that username recently though.
those users were banned long long ago
The main admin and several users expressed support for that very canard.
Up until that user shared private messages with Ada in a post. Then involved their "friend" (or rather an alt account) to apologise.
It was such a bloody mess.
Do not buy at IKEA then
Let them ban anyone they don't like from their instance. Also, report or ban them when they abuse others on other instances. If it is a self-inflicted isolation, it will be fairly earned.
Self-defense is a universal right. Those who attempt to take away that right unavoidably become representatives of fascism. You never silence a voice that argues self-defense, you defeat its arguments (objectively and thoroughly).
Moving forward tentatively, it's not about disengaging from a conflict. One needs to take a step back, use a method to clear their mind and view the situation without emotional attachment. Then attempt to solve the conflict into a acceptable or at least tolerable outcome. A conflict left unresolved will only fester into aggression and violence.
Simply moving on and allowing a perceived slight go unresolved does not work unless the objective solution found is to move on.
While the loss of a user is sad, people come and go. The better solution is to use the situation and apply the proper reports against those who target and abuse other users.
While the loss of a user is sad, people come and go. The better solution is to use the situation and apply the proper reports against those who target and abuse other users.
Tools like raising awareness of the behavior of a community and its admins?
I considered more in the vein of reporting the specific posts in question on their respective instances. Or using mod tools where available to ban problematic users from your own instances and communities.
But if you think it works, any solution you find should be sought. Even if it doesn't lead to the expected results, fighting for a fairer environment is rarely a wrong thing to do.
Pugjesus, I'm not directing this at you, it's more an opportunity to express this stuff when it isn't coming up in a community where this discussion isn't disruptive. This C/ is usually okay with discussion about the subject of a meme, so I'm taking the shot while it's fresh in my mind.
Look, in an ideal setting, this wouldn't be an issue because blahaj could wall itself off and be the trans dedicated space it needs to be.
Unfortunately, lemmy is not only difficult to use that way, but there's still a need to interact with outsiders because there's a war on. They need allies to have access, the users to be able to interact with other instances, and for trans people on other instances to be able to interact there.
They're going to fuck up because there's no way to make all of that work without admin oversight being high. There's always going to be human error, biases, and outright moments of emotional decisions. It happens everywhere.
But we gotta be realistic here. When blahaj admins fuck up, they're fucking up because they represent a populace that's under attack from the outside and the inside. There's a dozen topics that simply aren't one sided, which means any of those topics needs judgement calls.
Those of us that aren't blahaj users can STFU and mind our own when it comes right down to it, because it isn't our space. That goes for me too, if I end up banned for something I say elsewhere. Our trans compatriots fucking deserve a space where they can work this kind of thing out, even if that means a lot of mistakes along the way.
And the admins of blahaj are making mistakes. So are some of the users. The questions are, what are those mistakes, which users, and how can there be an objective decision as to what's the best path? I sure don't have a right to decide those things for blahaj, so my opinions are essentially farting in the wind. All I can do is support the trans community as a whole, and hope that blahaj finds a balance that allows the users and admins to have a space that is as free of interference and hate as is possible in this fucked up world.
Now, while preemptive bans are a damn difficult tool to use well, they are a valid tool. I personally wouldn't have used them in every case that's shown up on the various C/s about mod/admin actions, but I also don't have access to everything an admin would. There may be reasons I can't see. But I would have used it in a few of those cases. I prefer preemptives to be a scalpel rather than a scythe, but sometimes you have to cut.
One of these days, I'll finish up my thinking on the whole xenogender aspect of things, and maybe what I end up with as an opinion will get me banned from blahaj if/when I share it somewhere. If that's the case, I'll be sad because I genuinely love the people there, and I love the community. But if that's what's needed to keep that society community and those people able to have their own space in a world that's trying to literally eradicate them, so be it.
Wars never happen without harm to real people, and a lot of the war against trans people is a war waged with words and ideas. So neutering the words of war being able to besiege the instance seems like a worthy strategy to me.
Unfortunately, lemmy is not only difficult to use that way, but there’s still a need to interact with outsiders because there’s a war on. They need allies to have access, the users to be able to interact with other instances, and for trans people on other instances to be able to interact there.
So they choose to alienate allies and drive around trans people on other instances from the Fediverse entirely for wrongthink?
That seems counterproductive.
They’re going to fuck up because there’s no way to make all of that work without admin oversight being high. There’s always going to be human error, biases, and outright moments of emotional decisions. It happens everywhere.
Okay, so when is it no longer acceptable? Is it decided that they just get a total pass for all behavior because it's a trans-friendly space, so long as you're trans in a way that agrees with the mob mentality? If you aren't, of course, then you're a transphobe and a fascist.
Those of us that aren’t blahaj users can STFU and mind our own when it comes right down to it, because it isn’t our space.
It seems that Blahaj doesn't regard its space as having any borders.
Our trans compatriots fucking deserve a space where they can work this kind of thing out, even if that means a lot of mistakes along the way.
Apparently, not all trans compatriots are deserving.
And the admins of blahaj are making mistakes. So are some of the users. The questions are, what are those mistakes, which users, and how can there be an objective decision as to what’s the best path?
So, what, don't criticize Blahaj, don't point out anything negative they do, just let them do what they want because there's no 'objectively' correct answer? That wouldn't fly for any other community or admin team. Why here?
I sure don’t have a right to decide those things for blahaj, so my opinions are essentially farting in the wind. All I can do is support the trans community as a whole, and hope that blahaj finds a balance that allows the users and admins to have a space that is as free of interference and hate as is possible in this fucked up world.
And when the community on Blahaj harasses trans users off the Fediverse entirely for wrongthink? Is supporting Blahaj then supporting the trans community?
Now, while preemptive bans are a damn difficult tool to use well, they are a valid tool. I personally wouldn’t have used them in every case that’s shown up on the various C/s about mod/admin actions, but I also don’t have access to everything an admin would. There may be reasons I can’t see. But I would have used it in a few of those cases. I prefer preemptives to be a scalpel rather than a scythe, but sometimes you have to cut.
I think you're going way out of your way to justify what you realize are, visibly, bad decisions.
Wars never happen without harm to real people, and a lot of the war against trans people is a war waged with words and ideas. So neutering the words of war being able to besiege the instance seems like a worthy strategy to me.
By waging a war of words against trans folk who don't believe 'correctly' in other instances entirely?