Plot twist: She's already a lamp and this is inception
But the real Chad response would be: "Listen, as long as you light up my life..."
this post was submitted on 04 Feb 2025
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Oh man, lets play in that space! I have several questions:
-
Are you some kind of magic lamp that I can talk to that will respond?
-
If you're responsive, are you the same person as you are now, but in lamp form, or are you a different person?
-
We're you always a lamp or were you transformed by some kind of wizard curse?
-
If you were a lamp before we met, how did we meet?
-
what was our first date like?
-
Am I a lamp too? If so, was I also turned into one from a wizard curse?
You've clearly not had a long enough day lmao
No way man, I get to do a rad world building session with my girl where we work out the details of a whole AU where I might love a lamp.
I love dumb shit like that
I do too, but not after dealing with a production server outage before an important deadline at work
-Do you keep grues at bay?
"I would love you more"
Kiss her on the forehead.
Leave the room before she processes what just happened.
„Wait, does that mean you’d love me more, if you could turn me on whenever you like? Can’t you turn me on now? Is it that complicated that you’d rather exchange me for a lamp?!“
the lesson of the moth by archy
The character of Archy, created by Don Marquis in 1916, was a cockroach who had been a poet in a previous incarnation. To write he must leap headfirst onto the keys of a typewriter, and thus is unable to capitalize his letters.
i was talking to a moth
the other evening
he was trying to break into
an electric light bulb
and fry himself on the wires
why do you fellows
pull this stunt i asked him
because it is the conventional
thing for moths or why
if that had been an uncovered
candle instead of an electric
light bulb you would
now be a small unsightly cinder
have you no sense
plenty of it he answered
but at times we get tired
of using it
we get bored with the routine
and crave beauty
and excitement
fire is beautiful
and we know that if we get
too close it will kill us
but what does that matter
it is better to be happy
for a moment
and be burned up with beauty
than to live a long time
and be bored all the while
so we wad all our life up
into one little roll
and then we shoot the roll
that is what life is for
it is better to be a part of beauty
for one instant and then to cease to
exist than to exist forever
and never be a part of beauty
our attitude toward life
is to come easy go easy
we are like human beings
used to be before they became
too civilized to enjoy themselves
and before i could argue him
out of his philosophy
he went and immolated himself
on a patent cigar lighter
i do not agree with him
myself i would rather have
half the happiness and twice
the longevity
but at the same time i wish
there was something i wanted
as badly as he wanted to fry himself
archy
That was beautiful.
"As long as there's no follow-up questions, yes."
Very strange build-up for sexy time.
Sometimes I wonder if this sort of question is like an instinctual parental fitness test. Kids ask all sorts of wild questions, maybe this is a test to see if you can navigate that kind of question with tact.
That is a bad test, as you would react differently, if an adult asks or a child.
Perhaps, but then you introduce the factor of the adult being a capricious sexual partner. In both cases, your goal is to navigate the question without offending their opaque and confusing sensibilities.
"Capricious" is not a quality I look for in any social relationship, let alone somebody in sharing space with. 🤣
Likewise, I'm just hypothesizing.