this post was submitted on 30 Oct 2024
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Science Memes

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[–] [email protected] 202 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Absolutely nothing, because I wouldn't want a stranger to talk to me in an elevator and I was raised to do unto others.

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[–] [email protected] 126 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Considering it's only 8 seconds this must be the fastest fucking elevator ever so I'm probably screaming

[–] [email protected] 57 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

The elevator is actually out of order, she likes hanging in there, but you leave as soon as you see it doesn't work

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[–] [email protected] 107 points 3 weeks ago (8 children)

I make brief eye contact, purse my lips to form a half-smile, and nod my head downward. Then i move to an open corner of the elevator, i pull my phone out, and i end my turn.

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[–] [email protected] 92 points 3 weeks ago

Lady in red. It's a simulation, no experiment is going to show anything worthwhile.

"Look again."

looks

"Fuck, I wish you'd stop doing that, Morpheus."

[–] [email protected] 54 points 3 weeks ago

Nothing and just awkwardly stare on the floor or wall, like with anyone else.

[–] [email protected] 48 points 3 weeks ago (8 children)

Well, considering the only elevator I take is to a secure area, I'd ask to see your visitor's badge and inform you civilians aren't allowed here unescorted.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

She IS the escort.

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

Second 1: introduce myself

Second 2: Andrew Tate pose

Second 3: obtain phone number

Second 4: go on date

Second 5: head home with them

Second 6: get touchy

Second 7: undress

Second 8: get off at my floor because I already came at second 1.

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Absolutely nothing because people who have elevator conversations are not worth talking to.

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[–] [email protected] 37 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (5 children)

That's because you have big jugs.

I mean, your boobs are huge!

I mean, I want to squeeze em!

Mamma!

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[–] [email protected] 30 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Well, Pac-man was originally called Puck-man. They changed it because... Not because Pac-man looks like a hockey puck. "Paku Paku" means "flap your mouth", and they were worried that people would change, scratch out the P turn it into an F, like...

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[–] [email protected] 28 points 3 weeks ago (5 children)

I wouldn't say anything because some women find elevator pickup attempts intimidating.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago (10 children)

Tbf women say they find just interacting with men at all intimidating, see: Bears. I just don't talk to anyone anymore tbh.

I'm gonna die alone with my cats, but at least I won't be called creepy for asking a woman out for coffee!

Use the apps

No, privacy nightmare.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago

Don't trust what the loud voices say.

Many, if not most, women are normal humans like you, looking for interaction like you.

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 weeks ago

Nothing because I'm taking the stairs

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

"I can be done in 7."

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago (8 children)

Omg girl, you look amazing in that dress. I'm so jealous. Be safe girl and remember to cover your drink.

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[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Get in the lift.

Stare while ripping an absolutely rancid fart that strips the enamel off her teeth.

Sharpie my number across her tits and give her "double-guns" on the way out

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)
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[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

I don't understand. What's a uniform gravitational field and why does being inside one feels like standing in an accelerating elevator?

[–] [email protected] 27 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

This is a joke about Einstein's form of the Equivalence Principle:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Equivalence_principle

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

Thanks. Let's see:

The weak equivalence principle, also known as the universality of free fall or the Galilean equivalence principle can be stated in many ways.

And

"... in a uniform gravitational field all objects, regardless of their composition, fall with precisely the same acceleration." "The weak equivalence principle implicitly assumes that the falling objects are bound by non-gravitational forces."[11]

I'm just beginning to understand. I'm not there yet.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

If you are standing in a closed box, there is no experiment you can make that tells you whether that box is standing on earth, or is on a rocket in space accelerating at 9.81m/s²

This has a bunch of interesting implications about the nature of spacetime

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

If a hotdog is a sandwich, is the ocean a soup?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago (6 children)

A hotdog is not a sandwich.

If you serve bacon, lettuce, and tomato on a plate, you do not call that a sandwich.

But if you serve a hotdog without a bun, you still call it a hotdog.

QED.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago

I was expecting this to be a video where her tits bounce in an elevator. Thoroughly disappointed.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago

This is getting insane. I (somewhat at least) get those "you have 24hs with me" ones but what am i gonna do with you in 8 seconds. Id rather spend 24h with an egirl than 8 seconds with you lol.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago

Going down?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago

You don't have the proper PPE for the radiologically controlled area.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago

"Nice uhh, b-leather we're having, uh."

cry, drop my spaghetti and run out

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago

The modern mind is in complete disarray. Knowledge has stretched itself to the point where neither the world nor our intelligence can find any foot-hold. It is a fact that we are suffering from nihilism.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago

Tip my fedora and say M'Lady

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago

Nothing, I don't like small talk with strangers.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

How did you get into my private elevator? SECURITY!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

I was looking at my phone and didn’t notice you.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

Is this elevator always that fast?

(Before hitting either the ceiling or the floor and both dying, probably.)

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