Asklemmy

Gold, house, stonks.

I think I could legit buy my condo in an hour with that kind of money. But only if the agent is in this part of the city and not in her other home outside the city.

My wife could write up a basic contract that could work as she went to law school and used to do some work for a law firm.

But if that still does not count, then I’d probably order a bunch of computer stuff. Like a new laptop, all the parts for the latest pc stuff, a steam deck. Maybe a bunch of hard drives and some server level stuff.

I guess I’d have tons of money still leftover so I’d buy my wife some stuff that she would like.

I’d totally buy a steam deck. I want one so badly.

I can’t really think of things that I’d like to buy. That are not a car or house.

If I had 1 million in hand-

I am willing to bet the dealership could get me in and out pretty quickly!

Likewise, I have a friend selling a house. I am quite certain we can make a bill of sale in an hour.

But- since those options are off-limits. Honestly- there really aren't many options.

Since, its cash-in-hand, that likely means online transactions are against the rules.

SO- the best course of action would be to visit a store with a lot of expensive goodies. In my case, walmart is the best local option. Suppose I could buy out all of the TVs, game systems, etc. At least those would have the best resale value.

Stocks and bonds

It's just after noon and where I live, shops are open 365 days a year. The nearest IKEA is about a 30 min drive from here, I'll just ask the kitchen designer to print me a bill for 1.800 ovens, pay, then return everything within the 30 day free returns window.

Alternatively I would call my bank on the way and buy bearer bonds, traveler cheques, gold bars or whatever else, if they can issue them in time.

If I can't think of something better, I would donate to my university's foundation and earmark it for myself, or at least my department.

Or, I would just donate it to charity.

Or, pay off all my debts and donate to charity.

I mean, if I get that money via my bank app, just gonna buy some stocks and bonds with it, wait 60 minutes and cash them all in after. I get to keep the money after taxes are deducted, and then might as well get my life in order and start travelling with my newfound financial freedom.

8pm here. I'd buy a house using some house buying mobile app. I'd probably sell it afterwards when the time is right and add the money to my investments.

Probably a crap load of music studio gear then donate to one or more schools in my neighborhood

I'd buy a good FPV drone, a Hurdy Gurdy and a nice office chair. My current one sucks.

Yeah, that's it.

I would go out and find a store in which to buy liquid commodities, like gold, jewelry, etc. Anything that doesn't immediately degrade after being bought and becoming "used", and preferably something that can be returned, so I can quickly retrieve my money after "laundering" it away from being owned by the stipulation. And then, because having a shitload of money requires a shitload of thought, I would probably go find a nice cheap general aviation plane to buy for myself, or maybe a glider, and get my PPL, and live my dreams. And then maybe I'd buy and convert a work van into a place to live, and live the rest of my life out on the road hiking and camping. The rest, I could invest away in a safe and broad portfolio, and live my life worry-free. I live nowadays (excluding rent) on like $0 cause most of it is government aid anyway. So no more work.

Does the money go poof if you spend it? For example, say I buy some jewelry with half of the million dollars. Then, the time limit passes. Does just the half a million I still have on hand disappear or does the cash I spent vanish as well?

If the cash I spend vanishes, then I might be opening myself up to fraud charges after the hour is up. Going back to the jewelry situation. I buy half a million in jewelry and hand over the last of the cash just as the time limit ends. If the money in the store clerk's hands suddenly vanishes, they're going to demand their merchandise back. If I'm already walking out the door when it goes poof, they'll call the police on me.

Of course, if the money that I spend doesn't vanish after the time limit expires, then that's a different story.

A million dollars in bitcoin, I'd walk away with a cool $100 after selling it all.

In truth, being in a central Florida town at 7 in the morning, I'd go on a shopping spree at some of the bigger box stores and stock up on electronics and building supplies, before I blew the rest on tools.

Well, I have an online portal in which I can make payments on my house from anywhere, at any time. I pay off my house first. I still have quite a bit of cash left after that, but I don't really like the buy and return/sell back comments. I think that's a cop out. And I'm feeling lucky, so I'm gonna head to a casino that is about 15 minutes away from my house and put it all on black.

Considering I won't be able to actually get it into the bank account on time because of KYC, the best thing I can do is to purchase the closest convenience store that is next to my house - I don't think the dude will reject a transaction in cash

• Whelp, It's still just barely afternoon for me, so I'd gotta get to the bank as fast as possible to get my card straightened out so I can go online and order a bunch of things like art commissions from digital artists I like and then go onto other sites like Etsy or eBay to get things like a couple different knock-off pokemon plushies (looking at you, grafaiai).

• Then find DVD/Blu-ray sets for the cartoons I really like. Shows like Ahhh! Real Monsters or Code Lyoko. Whatever I could think of in the moment because I'd be too busy freaking out in excitement.

• Probably go to some place like a thrift store and buy some clothes for my stuffed rabbit and bear since I think they would look lovely in some nice clothes (even if they are baby clothes).

• After all that is purchased, I wouldn't know what to do, so probably just spend it on games on Steam or donating to groups like the people behind LibreOffice or Krita. Just giving a little towards the development of open source products I like in order to thank them for their product.

Edit:

I would only deposit a small amount into the bank so that way I would be able to use my card to buy all of these items online. I'd assume the money isn't directly deposited into my bank account, so I'd need to manually do it.

Thankfully I live close enough it'd only take less than 10 minutes to get in. Getting an appointment, might be an issue, so I might have to scrap all of the online shopping plans and just go to the game store I like and just buy a ton of old games and a pro controller for my switch and if they have it, another switch and a copy of pokemon scarlet so I can complete the pokedex on my violet save by either modding the switch or starting 2 new saves and doing LAN trading.

Disappear as in physically disappear? I wouldn't spend that "money" knowing that I will be sued.

Disappear as in I don't get to spend that money? Buy my mother's phone with 1 million and let her use the phone anyway.

I'd immediately spend my actual, IRL money in my bank account on an Uber to the nearest bank machine and shove as much of the cash in there as possible.

Assuming stuff was still open, I'd go to the bank and deposit it immediately.

Afterward I would pay off every debt I have online.

After that? Pay off my sister's car and my girlfriend's college debt. Then probably rent as far in advance as possible.

I honestly wouldn't have much time after doing that so I would maybe do an online grocery order to stock up and then seriously make a random DoorDasher's day.

I would prepare myself to take a BIG loss.

I think I would go on Amazon or eBay and order a bunch of new or slightly-used laptops. Then I would spend the next few months selling them at bargain prices. I would never get the whole million back, but I'd make some damn good money.

Somebody smarter than me might buy something that will gain value over time instead of losing it, but hey, I only have an hour so this is the best plan I could come up with!

The answer to this heavily depends on how the funds are supplied. If it is in an account I can buy stock with an instant transfer. if it is cash, it is essentially worthless since counting it and the transaction will take over an hour. If we are counting only the agreement to purchase then I would choose property. While this is sn interesting question, I think it is more of a question about how we define "buy". One million dollars is a large enough amount to set off lots of red flags and questions, but not so large that you commonly move that amount of money. For someone who frequently does large transactions it would be basically business as usual. For the average person it would be a logistical nightmare.