this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2023
317 points (97.9% liked)

Terrible Estate Agent Photos

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Terrible photos listed by estate agents/realtors that are so bad they’re funny.

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Not that it's the most desirable property to buy in the first place: https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/3204-Oak-Ridge-Rd-Vicksburg-MS-39183/78102111_zpid/?

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Does the toilet look to long to anyone else?

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's a bariatric toilet and the image is weirdly compressed.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I had to Google that but, apparently, that's definitely a thing. I suppose I should have realised that with bigger arses come bigger toilets.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The image is compressed vertically.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Pity, I was hoping for long toilets to be a thing for some reason.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

For when you had too much fiber and get the exact amount of Courics.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think the picture is stretched but some toilets in the US have a pronounced oval shape.

becauseFor our big 🍆

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm British and meat two veg is like everything else over here, modest. We'd not want to make a fuss with overly-large genitalia. And we thought you Yanks had such big cars because you were over-compensating for something. Apparently not.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

They'll grow when you liberate yourself from monarchists.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I've just thrown all my tea in river. When can I expect my over-sized genitalia?

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

side-eye-1

bruhLOL this Brit has no tea

You gotta get with the times, we've moved on to smashing K-Cups.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Also in the description,

"This manufactured home will require some updates."

Definitely a bulldozer is needed :D

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's 100% not a tear down reno. It just needs new flooring and some paint. Probably $5k tops.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

A soggy, 20 year old trailer is absolutely a tear down, even if it's in quite a bit better shape than this one IMHO. Those things have glued in panels that turn to roach sugar, I've never seen one over 15 years old, regardless of how clean the tenants/owners kept their living space, that didn't have a massive roach infestation hiding somewhere.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Lol no joke something just like this sold for $650k CAD near me

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I guess I have to wait for another recession to buy a house

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yowch.

My good friends bought a house that had been shown on Hoarders and they had to empty out the prior owner’s belongings after they died. They said that this person just opened up some drawers and their cat had been using them as a shitbox for months without being emptied. A million other such gross details. I helped them out in day by going over there to wipe out their kitchen cabinets with bleach. By that time the stuff has mostly been emptied out. They said that there had been a refrigerator there, sitting unplugged and full of rotten food but the door was closed and the seal intact. So they tried to just get the whole damn fridge out to the curb and hauled away.

But! They got it to the doorway and it was one inch too wide so of course they had to open up the fridge and take its door off to make it narrower. No dead bodies inside but there might as well have been.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I have done hurricane disaster relief before, and I can attest that there is no smell on this planet that equates to a refrigerator unplugged for several weeks but still intact

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

At least the price is justified for once

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

idk I'm not American, I keep seeing million dollar properties in American ads

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Well they did knock it down $300

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

If it was anywhere except Mississippi.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Free murder carpet.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Oh neat, SCP-173’s containment chamber is up for sale! I wonder where he wen—

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I can smell the Luminol off the carpet.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Seems they've misunderstood shelfie.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

This is so uncanny. I love it. I just wouldn't want to live in Liminal space

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I mean, it’s only $40,000. I’m sure you could get a loan for $60,000 to fix it up.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The only thing that could fix that up is a fire.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

You could find much better property for $100,000 in Mississippi.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Oh I mean the total loan would be $60k. $20k to fix it up.

I dunno. Whatever. Point is it’s not as bad as some of the stuff I’ve seen on here.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I've fixed up worse, not for the feint of heart for sure!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I can't look at that without thinking of this music:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1bhC0cbmre4

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago

Somebody added a sunroom on a double-wide… ¡Madre de Dios!