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Third Spaces and Card Games (lemm.ee)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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A few days ago I watched a TikTok about leftists, third spaces, and being social.

I didn't agree with the video on some levels, but it did resonate pretty strongly with me.

The main thesis was that leftism online and pro-social movements are often led or promoted by people and in spaces where people actually display rather anti-social behaviour. Specifically, they talked about how people will complain about the lack of third spaces---not work, not home---and say that that is the reason they stay home, can't meet people, can't get partners, can't enjoy community/interpersonal hobbies, and other such complaints. The video argues that, even if these third spaces existed, these people would not even appreciate them because they're antisocial, they're obsessed with an ideal of society and they are so close-minded, in a way, that they end up ignoring everything and everyone. Now, that part I disagree with. It's not that these people don't exist---I'm sure they do---but from my experience leftists are social people. I'm not someone that enjoys going out to parties and whatnot, events, but I do enjoy talking to other people. I enjoy art, I like to discuss it and I like to talk with others about it. One thing I really love to do is play games.

I think games are a great way to socialize.

I don't frequent any third spaces, right now. I'm sure they're out here, and I think I've actually mentioned one that I know about though it doesn't fit my particular interests, but I love having opportunities to socialize. For me, online is the easiest way to do this because online is where I can find people that share my interests. I don't really feel like there's a need for more third spaces around me. Maybe I'm the antisocial person they were talking about and that's why I don't see the problem, then again I'm not the person complaining about this stuff so maybe not.

Regardless, I've been feeling an itch to play card games. I really, really want to play card games with people. I used to do it all the time with friends, but I haven't in years. A shame, truly.

Hopefully soon I'll get to it.

xoxo

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I haven't seen the video, but I agree with the point that leftists are social people; at least, to no less extent than any other political wing. I too would love to visit those spaces and play some games with you. I used to be a huge card player myself!

A couple of issues still plague us:

the monetization of all spaces. Churches have managed to avoid this, and of course you don't have to pay to be at work, but what's left? Game stores have at least a lowkey expectation that you'll spend some money there while you're playing. Libraries don't allow noise. Outdoors isn't gonna work for gatherings like this. Pubs expect you to spend money and are usually too loud. I wish there were tax-exempt secular places for gatherings, but all we get there is public parks.
COVID. I'm gonna avoid spending time indoors around anyone who isn't a close friend. By itself, this almost rules out me visiting any third spaces that do exist.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Libraries don’t allow noise.

Have you been to your local libraries lately to check on this? I know it's one of those details libraries are well known for, but some libraries are more relaxed about this, so long as events aren't going on or you're not being so loud as to be a disturbance to others.

It may seem weird to ask, but next time you visit your library you might find a way to ask if they're the shush sort of library or an in-door voices are okay sort (supposing they don't already have signage to tell you which).

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

Libraries often have gaming dates. My local branch has regular Magic: the Gathering sessions, for example.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

The monetization is a good point, actually.

I think great places to socialize also imply social hobbies. I used to play in a philharmonic and lots of us hung-out after rehearsal at the rehearsal building. There was a little bar there but because we were part of the band we were welcome and would often actually be given free food and drinks. We'd just stay there, watch TV, and play cards into the night. I did this for like 8 years since I was 9 til 17. The adults also hung-out for a long time. Before COVID.

The place I mentioned in the post that I've seen here is at a mall. Some people meet up there to play MTG (which I don't really play) and they do it pretty often, it seems, at least I've seen them many times. It's next to a card shop but it's not affiliated. I wonder if there's the expectation of buying stuff in that case as well. Regardless, it does feel like a mall---a place where people go to spend money---does carry the implication that money will be spent.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Many of the examples of third places require some kind of payment by the participants. Either for entry, or to buy food or drink when they're there.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

From the Wikipedia article about the guy who coined the term:

Examples of third places include churches, cafes, bars, clubs, libraries, gyms, bookstores, hackerspaces, stoops, parks, theaters, among others.

In my experience, cafes welcome board gamers when we're not there at peak times, make occasional purchases, and are quiet and respectful.

If you don't already know people to play with IRL, you might want to find a local meetup or group that has an ongoing thing.