this post was submitted on 16 Aug 2024
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cross-posted from: https://lemmy.autism.place/post/222147

I'm excited to see what everyone else's said, if we have a lot in common, and if some of us have some funny stuff too.

Also, promoting [email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

He had a huge collection of toy cars and Lego’s. He was very into video games in which he designed and built things.

He could not stand when his foods touched.

His uncle, the last of this remaining relatives, points out that he was “not normal”.

He had difficulty sitting still, made noise, and was disruptive.

He has always talked to himself and would narrate what he was doing almost as though someone was in the room.

...Has liked to collect information about history and anything about science. He reports he “can be annoying” about it.

Though he is heterosexual, he would hang out with the gay kids because they were more accepting.

He joined the Marine Corps...it was a very intense and loud experience.

He had a very sensitive sense of smell, and would smell people as a child.

He is very sensitive to the texture of clothing and doesn’t tolerate tags. He is particular about his shoes.

He does not like to be interrupted at work and this offends other people. [He] becomes overwhelmed by unnecessary tasks such as work emails.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

11/13 for me

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Your collection of toy cars reminded me that I loved Hot Wheels as a kid in the '90s and early '00s. And I would often have to get more whenever we went to the store. Or at the very least see what they had. Luckily they were cheap so my parents were ok getting 1 or 2 each time.
I was also really good at remembering what ones I already had, so I knew at the store what ones I didn't have.
It's been a long time since I counted, but I amassed over 300 cars by the time I grew out of them.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

yep! we were very similar 🙂

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I appreciate the story of these two sentences illustrating growing up without any diagnosis:

"Received 4th grade math homework in 2nd grade because he got furious over how trivial homework was."

...16 years later...

"Patient has with SIGNIFICANT difficulties and enormous effort managed to complete an education." (Emphasis theirs)

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

can you explain what you see as the story from those two quotes pls?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Sure!

It's apparently a common thing: Kids who are "smart" and are clearly naturally interested in learning, are not followed up usefully. They can read novels and some basic multiplication, but have to sit in school and say the alphabet out loud and add single digits for months. Before proceeding to be told to read basic sentences for another few weeks, etc.

They are not pushed and challenged like their classmates. The teachers think everything is FINE because they are not behind, but the kids spend a full decade not learning to study properly because they don't ever have to. They rather learn that they can fuck around and wing it and it will be passable.

Then at some point, age 15 and up, they are getting to proper challenging stuff. Armed with zero habits, no experience in failing, no experience in planning and organizing and studying methodically... Many drop out, burn out, get depressed, or all of those at once.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

I am in this picture. I excelled in school almost all years and graduated in the top ten of my high school class. Then I went to an engineering school and got my ass handed to me. I managed to graduate after 5 years, but it was a struggle and my GPA was noticeably worse than high school.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)
  • a long time without two-way communication, now he can adapt because it's expected of him
  • mostly uniform "social smile" with little variation
  • generally a rather uniform and seemingly distant facial expression
  • social chatting only with family members, not others
  • little interest in other kids his age, rarely (if at all) being the one to initiate contact

Found this in some doctors notes from a few years back, not sure if it was specifically autism related but it seems close enough :P

It's kinda funny now seeing my smile at the time being described with little variation and sometimes seeming sightly condescending. Makes me wonder how much of that was just me trying to smile at appropriate times

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

What are uniform and distant facial expressions?? This is what I'm imagining:

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

lol. Is that an HDMI port as mouth? :P

Basically meant a neutral facial expression with little variation, mostly staying the same. And distant as in "this has nothing to do with me" or "whatever..."

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

lol

😆

Is that an HDMI port as mouth? :P

It looks like one! But what I was going for was a forced smile.

distant as in "this has nothing to do with me" or "whatever..."

ohhh yeahhhh, I know that feeling. I'm going to pay attention to see if I notice a resembling facial expression.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

My guess is that there were too many strangers around for my liking so I just kinda retracted myself to wait and see. Which isn't all that helpful when you're the one to be assessed :D

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

His eye contact was variable; at times he avoided eye contact and at times he utilized intense, prolonged eye contact. He was able to communicate his own feelings and showed insight into others’ emotions, though he did not spontaneously label emotions during any of the activities.

Radicalautonomy showed some insight into the nature of some social relationships but had trouble understanding his own role in them. Generally, Radicalautonomy frequently attempted to maintain the examiner’s attention and made appropriate social overtures. His response to the examiner’s social interactions was limited. Most social communication included some reciprocity (back-and-forth), but he tended to engage in more one-sided or weaving communication (e.g. offering topics, facts, or information).

As a result, the quality of rapport was sometimes comfortable and sometimes stilted. With respect to Restricted and Repetitive Behaviors, which are best referred to as special interests, repetitive actions, or desire for routine and sameness, Radicalautonomy did use echolalia and used some unique verbalizations that seemed to be idiosyncratic or stereotyped (i.e., highly repetitive utterances with consistent intonation patterns).

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Man...I know the point of these assessments is to be as critical as possible and the report is supposed to be detailed, but I find that report judgmental af. I wonder why. Am I sensitive to things like that? Is it the tone? Was it that they were critical about certain matters, such as someone judging you because you didn't do things they didnt ask of you and it comes off as them being entitled? Any ideas??

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I think the doctor was just being thorough. I didn't take it as judgmental. She really just wanted to highlight every area in which a neurodivergent person might differ from neurotypical people. There were a lot of parts of the diagnosis which stated "[In this area being discussed], Radicalautonomy was unremarkable", meaning I did not differ significantly from neurotypical people in that area.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Thanks for that! Based on what you said, I think my judgement of her report is more of a thing I bring to it. Now, I gotta figure out what's going on with me that I felt that way. 🤔

[–] [email protected] -1 points 2 months ago

So, as a non-autistic person, something I've noticed, is that people with autism can't handle anything that remotely describes them as stupid and useless (exaggerated sense of self/narcisism). This wouldn't normally be an issue however, except it compounds with this other thing I've noticed, that people with autism have this intense urge to reach 100%, and anything less than that is actually 0% (in other words, yall see things in black and white).

-

This interaction produces this awkward logic where anything negative (including personal mistakes) is taken as a personal insult, which produces one of two results, A (you have personally insulted me, that means I get to personally act like a complete asshole on purpose and/or meltdown), or B (somebody/or myself said something negative about me, and that means I'm stupid and useless and sad now).

-

Since tone is something that asian cultures have built in to their language, and the lack of ability to understand tone and its effect on communication is incredibly obvious from my standpoint.

-

Anyways, long story short, purely neutral descriptive language and judgemental language are very different. Purely descriptive language, especially scientific, often tries to describe a thing in as many words as possibly allowed, because otherwise you run into information compression loss (too much jpg). If you want to be accurate, and accuracy is tantamount in any scientific field, then every possible description from every possible viewpoint is required. This is the opposite of what people with autism like to do, which is "efficient". Yall gonna end up describing a moon rock like, "it is grey and dusty", which is severely useless. Sometimes you cannot describe an object in less than 20,000 words, especially if you've never seen it before.

-

Autism being a spectrum of traits in variable degrees of effect, I would expect such 20 page papers when trying to formally diagnose someone.

-

If you wanna see some judgemental language and the difference between such and anything not, go on r/roastme and check out the roasts.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I am trying to find a place locally to take my assessment, but because I'm an adult, I need to pay for it. It's so hard to get an adult diagnosis, like as if they are trying to prevent you from doing this, because it has no presence in an adult, so you're wasting our time.

I hope I can bring back some quality lines.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

I had to pay for mine too. Luckily, I found out that my local state university has a program for autistic people of all ages. I asked them for an assessment. While they didn't conduct the assessments themselves, they gave a long list of psychologists in the area that did. I used that to find someone and was assessed within ~1.5 months. Perhaps there is something similar in your area. Maybe try internet searching for your location and autism services to find a starting point.

I hope I can bring back some quality lines.

😁

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

Will I haven't read my report. One of the people doing the evaluation said to my mum after meeting my father " Well we can see where it comes from", it is a very fitting description.