this post was submitted on 30 Jul 2024
287 points (95.3% liked)

Terrible Estate Agent Photos

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Terrible photos listed by estate agents/realtors that are so bad they’re funny.

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[–] cheddar 26 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

I'm torn between "this is terrible" and "this is somewhat good". I've seen much worse that's for sure.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 months ago

This is the finest house in Whoville.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago (4 children)

I know this post's title as the title of an old science fiction short story I read as a kid 35 years ago (it was already old! you be quiet) about a guy who builds his house as an unfolded tesseract net of cubes, but then there is an earthquake and the house folds itself along the fourth dimension and it becomes an actual hypercube, with the inhabitants lost and confused inside.

But I wonder now if that story's title was already a reference to something else? Or do other people know that story?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

I am referencing that story and it's Wikipedia page says:

"'—And He Built a Crooked House—'"[a] is a science fiction short story by American writer Robert A. Heinlein, first published in Astounding Science Fiction in February 1941.[1] It was reprinted in the anthology Fantasia Mathematica (Clifton Fadiman, ed.) in 1958, and in the Heinlein collections The Unpleasant Profession of Jonathan Hoag in 1959 and The Best of Robert Heinlein in 1973. The story is about a mathematically inclined architect named Quintus Teal who has what he thinks is a brilliant idea to save on real estate costs by building a house shaped like the unfolded net of a tesseract. The title is paraphrased from the nursery rhyme "There Was a Crooked Man".

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

Oh, it's Heinlein, yeah, I guess maybe a few other people have read it...

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Wait, I think I remember this story! Thank you for the memory and now to see if I can find it again!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

In case you haven’t come back to the post, the story is by Robert Heinlein with the (almost) same title as the post.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It was a reference to the mathematical Orb, or at least a cube version of it.

https://www.mathsisfun.com/geometry/circle-theorems.html

This can be used to make basically any complex data structures and store physical objects inside.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

I read and enjoyed all of those theorems.

Math IS fun!!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)

The Eastern Europe in this is overwhelming

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It's a more 90's aesthetic where materials were available but not the finances to hire someone to do it well, so people did stuff like wallpaper by themselves instead with varying degrees of success.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

People still do that, though maybe less. Men in the family are electricians, masons, plumbers, all at the same time, and with varying degrees of success.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

Yes, but you can now afford better tools and materials, online tutorials and tool rentals exist, which can improve your odds a lot with a little preparation.

Edit: I live in an apartment where a construction worker used to live. It's full of dumb kludges and half jobs, or as slavs would call it, "khaltura".

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

No matter how good your tools and materials, a skilled enough amateur can fuck it up. You can't account for taste either. Furniture shapes aside, those bed covers and the couch are also not something I'd have in my house.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

The only outrageous thing i am seeing is the material and colour choice in the bedroom

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

The color schemes, lack of natural light, terrible wall textures, and dated patterns are what kill this for me. The weird slanted perspective furniture actually elevates it, if anything.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

Looney-Tunes lookin' furniture.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago

I love the idea behind it, just the execution is lacking.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

Mažeikiai is where the oil refinery is situated in. Maybe it's prolonged exposure to petrochemicals.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

The last two pics (master bedroom?) and the kitchen kinda give me anxiety with all the slanted furniture but the rest looks good to me

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago (2 children)

What are those exfrydijg out? Almost looks like microphones.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I think they're LEDs on stiff, bent wires

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

Ah, I guess that makes more sense

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

I expect them to be tiny lights to bring that alien mushroom forest aesthetic.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

And they all lived together in a little crooked house.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

It's from a nursery rhyme. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/There_Was_a_Crooked_Man

There was a crooked man, and he walked a crooked mile,

He found a crooked sixpence against a crooked stile;

He bought a crooked cat which caught a crooked mouse,

And they all lived together in a little crooked house.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Is this a situation where they were planning a remodel, discussed their inability to cut straight lines, said fuck it and doubled down?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Its a Pre-React style build.

Its alllll angular

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Looks like the ceilings follow the roof lines instead of being flat so they just made the furniture follow those lines

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

Thanks, I hate it.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

Tim Burton, is that you?

[–] [email protected] -1 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

There's a link to the actual listing in this thread.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

Nope, just Lithuania