this post was submitted on 02 Jun 2024
234 points (97.6% liked)

Food Crimes - Offenses against nutrition

2160 readers
10 users here now

Welcome to Food Crimes! This community is here to collect all and any post about cursed food and generally unusual consumables.

Right now, here’s the rules:

  1. Posts must include an image or video containing food or drink.
  2. It must be unusual or cursed in some way. a. For example, something like Doritos Milk would be unusual, but normal milk would not.
  3. No AI posts whatsoever, and any images that were altered (Ex: Photoshop, Gimp) need to be tagged.

How to tag: To tag your posts, please prepend or append the tag name inside square brackets. For example,[OC] Foo bar baz or foo bar baz [Meta] would be acceptable. Multiple tags will require separate pairs of brackets, like so: [Edited][OC] foo bar baz

Here are the current tags:

Finished checking out all the posts here? Also checkout [email protected]!

(BTW, I’m looking for someone to help mod here! I myself would not be enough if this community goes beyond a few posts a day.)

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
top 39 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 22 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I like spam musubi so this doesn’t look completely terrible – a little heavy handed on the ketchup and mustard maybe

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I agree that it's probably less of an offense against nutrition and more against tradition.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Bastard Cookbook, Antto Melasniemi and Rirkrit Tiravanija (2019)

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (4 children)

Pad Thai with macaroni sounds legit (unless you are gluten intolerant).

Curry Pizza has lowkey been a thing for years already. In Sweden they'll also put bananas on it and it's basically a national dish.

I've also had burritos filled with tikka masala and chickpea curry instead of meat, rice and beans.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago

Chicken tikka masala pizza 🤤

Just this one chain has nine locations in California:

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)

We have a Welsh friend who makes "WeLsh Lasagne"...basically Lasagne with curry.

Italians feel a disturbance in the force every time he makes it...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I tried to google this but it doesn't seem to be a "thing", all I found was this recipe which is basically regular lasagna, just made with Welsh beef and cheese, so perhaps this is your friend's own creation?

It doesn't sound repugnant but I require more details. What exactly is in it?

Years ago I was on a school trip in Wales and they fed us Bolognese with mutton instead of beef. This didn't work out too well – at least half of the class ended up praying to the porcelain god that night.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Oh yeah it's definitely his own creation...he cooks very well but then again is Welsh (beans on toast, pasties cooked via sunlight they are so pale) so curry makes things exotic.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Okay, still need some more details if you please... what kind of curry? What kind of meat? What else is in there I might not expect?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Sorry to be vague, but that's just it. Regular ol Lasagne with curry powder.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Does the curry powder go in the bolognese or the béchamel?

Probably doesn't matter, sounds like a crime either way. Curried béchamel would probably even be kinda good, but I wouldn't pair it with bolognese.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Pretty sure it's with the ground beef boloñesa.

Funny thing, I've never used béchamel in Lasagne before moving to the EU, it was always ricotta with garlic, basil and egg beaten into it, with a splrinkle of shredded mozzarella on the layer.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

Yeah, American lasagna is slightly different in that regard. Perhaps they burned the béchamel one too many times.

Also, I'll pass on the curry bolognese. I might be convinced to give this one a try, however.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

haard pass, ill just have a curry!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Throw in some hummus and use naan or pita instead of a tortilla and I’m in. (I make these at home because my wife’s not a big falafel fan.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

You might want to look into making dosas, sounds like they'd be right up your alley.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

bulgogi burrito from HRD in San francisco is incredible

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

I'll take your word for it.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 months ago (4 children)

I’m constantly offended by excessive condiments on everything. One of the worst I’ve seen is Shawarma poutine (here in Canada). Look, you can’t even see the fries!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago

I don't see the issue with excessive condiments, just eat however much you want and they don't suck as much when saved till later (just add more fries or whatever else). Way better than too little, which is more common.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

Sigh. Thanks for giving me a new craving that’s gonna be hard to satisfy.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

That reminds me of a hilarious Instagram video I saw the other day, but of course I can't find it again now.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

This looks delicious

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago

Now that would make it a proper crime.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Is that a fucking Sushi dog

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

Yes Watson, that does indeed appear to be the case.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

Raw dogging as its known.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago (1 children)

And Belgium is like: "Choose the cultural appropriation to spray over your fries"

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

Well, France stole the fries. Seems fair to me.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago (1 children)

This causes me fear and arousal.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

As expected of SatansMaggotyCumFart

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

Come on, instead of rice it should have been a puffed rice marshmallow treat.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I want sushi!

We have sushi at home.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

Hackepeterbrötchen!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I think I'd actually be down to try this, with a little bit lighter condiments.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

Hey, it's a free country! Knock yourself out.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

I've known this as "redneck sushi."