this post was submitted on 04 Mar 2024
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[–] [email protected] 100 points 8 months ago (3 children)

There's definitely value in not constantly being tethered to a device reminding you how many steps you've taken, e-mails, etc. Also I'm reminded me of a quote:

“Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the western spiral arm of the Galaxy lies a small unregarded yellow sun. Orbiting this at a distance of roughly ninety-two million miles is an utterly insignificant little blue green planet whose ape-descended life forms are so amazingly primitive that they still think digital watches are a pretty neat idea.” ― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

[–] [email protected] 33 points 8 months ago (2 children)

ape-descended

It's very popular to call humans some variant of this, and while it's correct, it also implies that humans are no longer apes. They are.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Plot twist: Adam's earthlings were probably mostly Golgafrinchans.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

well they were entirely made up of account executives, insurance salesmen, and management consultants so I think it's still fair to call them "ape-descended"

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

This is true, there are two kinds of animal, monkey or ape. Because if it doesn't have a tail it's not a monkey, even if it's a monkey kinda shape. If it doesn't have a tail it's not a monkey, if it doesn't have a tail...it's an ape!

Or at least that's what I learned from my parents force feeding me nothing but VeggieTales for far too long.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Yup, that's correct! Primates without tails are apes, and we're a primate without a tail.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago (4 children)

Well what they applied the example to was a cow, citing that due to its tail out was a monkey of course lol. But yeah it does apply to primates for sure. Also a notable example is in Pokémon where you have mankey who evolves into primeape and loses their tail in the process. Of course this also kind of implies that apes are just angrier, stronger monkeys.

Also completely unrelated to our conversation, but relevant to your username...Metriod is my absolute favorite gaming series, Metriod Prime is amazing, and I always wanted to be Samus when I grew up.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago (1 children)

The dream used to be one device that does everything but I've backed away from that mentality hard. I even have two separate PCs now with nothing syncing between them.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago

Only because the dreams of digital security and privacy (and functionality) died first. If I could be confident doing work and personal stuff on the same devices, I would.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

Digital watches are sweet and have very specific advantages in certain contexts. Douglas Adams just doesn't get the G Shock hype!

[–] [email protected] 83 points 8 months ago (3 children)

“ We promise it’s not just jewelry for men, promise, because men don’t wear jewelry. This is just a tool, and maybe a status symbol, but definitely not in the way jewelry can be a status symbol.”

[–] [email protected] 24 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (2 children)

I like to wear a watch, it’s shiny and has gold. Definitely jewelry but also I like to be able to check the time without my phone. I don’t think people are going for Timex as a status symbol though. They’re cheap watches.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 8 months ago

Well, I think MY cheap watch is a status symbol.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I don’t think it’s bad, I just think it’s funny that so many men will refuse to wear jewelry unless it’s a watch.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Lots of masculine men wear jewelry. I see necklaces, earrings, any piercings are jewelry, rings, what’s more iconic than an construction site super with a big ass pinky ring.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Wrist watches used to be women's wear. Pocket watches were for men until WW1 when they found out that wrist mounted timepieces are super handy when you need to carry a rifle all the time and launch attacks synchronized with walking artillery barrages.

Just like anything else it can be purely for looks or purely for function but the best stuff does both at once. A nice looking precise watch, a pen that looks and writes great, dress shoes comfortable enough to wear all day, an Italian suit with a tactical liner lol

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I think I'd go for a pocket smartwatch since they have no need for a lot of sensors and room for a bigger battery. And yes, I do know that if you will take something out of your pocket anyway, why not just your phone? For that I have no answer, I still want one

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

First half: Heh, ironic because a phone is just a bigger smart watch, especially with an always on oled.

Second half: What would that even look like!?

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

Why not air allow yourself something that you like to look at and will look at often? Especially if it means looking at your phone less.

Plus even someone (smart) with an AP can respect a cool $60 watch, doesn't have to be a status symbol or for others at all. (And in fact the first thing people realize when they start watch collecting is that 99% of people aren't looking at them.)

[–] [email protected] 64 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Father, I cannot click the watch

[–] [email protected] 50 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Dearest birthing parent of mine, this timepiece responds not to my attempts at manipulation

[–] [email protected] 24 points 8 months ago (1 children)

To whom it may concern (the progenitor of my very existence):

The clockwork temporal measurement device strapped 'pon the writhing fleshy tentacle protruding from mine own thorax remains sullen and unchanging despite my best efforts at provocation.

Please advise.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago (1 children)

O dear original source of half of my genetic material, including the differentiating heterotypical chromosome!

Despite my many attempts at interacting through my somatosensory system with what looked like a haptic receptor of a timekeeping mechanism attached to my sinestro-anterior limb, the visual indicator of the aforementioned radiocarpal joint-mounted machine keeping track of the flow of hours, minutes and seconds (important: please note only the latter is a SI unit) remains devoid of any hint of a reactive process consequential to my stimulus.

What the fuck.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)
Brought forth, my mind, my spirit, conscience and flesh and all
Into this universe, by merit of affections made by thee
As forebearer, Zeus as to Hephaestus, as you to me
Echoing ancestral age's call

From infant times, whenst could I not procure my own
Through learning and advancing in my worth
You held me high, and pushed me forth
By song affirmative in words and tone

This trust of merits, my esteem, oft besong by you
Make these words, this moment, this request
Become the heaviest of my behest
Albeit an inquire I can not undo

Upon my arm, as equator round our very earth
Is bound with leather strap, and nimble lock
A dream of time, of days, of tick and tock
Of life, it's passage, to the grave from birth

A timepiece, chroniker, a metronome, a watch
In and of itself a wondrous thing
And as I watch it circumnavigate it's ring
I have but a single question, single catch

When on it's surface, with extended digits laid
With tap, with stroke, with haste, with patience and between
Expected outcome of my action, none are seen
And of my merits, now am I afraid

I humbly ask of you, my genesis, my kin
Am I the one who know not how to utilize
This measurer of time, this timeless prize
Am I unknown to functions laid within

No prodding, poking, touch or stroke
Have rendered changes visually
And therefore I conclude I now can see
The functions I can not provoke

I utter loudly "what the fuck"
Have you equipped it with parental lock?
[–] [email protected] 41 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (3 children)

67,055. Amateurs.

e: proof:

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I've never seen a badge go past 999.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I’m excited to see what happens at 999,999.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago

That’s my personal email – which was public at one point because I was the contact for a festival – and I stopped caring to weed out spam like fifteen years ago. I’ve had this account for more than 20 years.

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 8 months ago (3 children)

Self report for being unable to figure out how to disable notifications. My watch tells me the shit I want it to tell me.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago (3 children)

Good for you, now you just have an ugly watch!

[–] [email protected] 17 points 8 months ago

I didn’t get it to be pretty, I got it to track my heart rate and give me medication reminders. 👍

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

I think the beautiful colorful screens and many faces of smart watches are often more attractive than another plain looking standard watch. That timex is ugly

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

That he has to charge every other night.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Sticking it in the charger while I shower isn’t hard. 🤷‍♂️

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Mfs really be like “ohh but you gotta charge it once every day or two” ok and? The things are tiny it takes like half an hour to charge my apple watch se once a day, and that’s after 2-3 years of daily usage so it’s battery isn’t exactly happy anymore

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)

That's the biggest issue of smartwatches IMO. They will all end up in a landfill after approximately 5 years while you'll be able to give that Timex (or your F91W that costs less than a pizza) to your grandkids.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Honestly over smart watches. Back to my Casio Wave Ceptor!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I would honestly enjoy a watch like that if it didn't have 6768342 pieces of text on it. I'd rather have to read the manual and have a less cluttered looking watch. For now, I'll stick to my automatic Seiko.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

They make minimalist and ana-digi wave ceptors that are pretty sweet. Plus a classic square g shock model will have very little clutter, even less on a Timex Ironman if you like that look.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 8 months ago

I have a watch. I like it. Something about hands in a circle for estimating time is easier.

I have a phone too, but it's in my pocket.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I have 22887 unread emails

[–] [email protected] 16 points 8 months ago

Bro stop signing up for store mailing lists

[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Can you not simply turn that off on most smart watches? Actual question, I haven't owned one in a while

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

Yeah, I disabled the notifications for email on mine.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

Didn't they solve this issue with classical wrist watches with an LED that blinks if your phone has a notification?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Or have your watch tell you "Great Job!" when you scratch your butt

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