this post was submitted on 15 May 2024
814 points (99.2% liked)

The Onion

4502 readers
921 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 102 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Joseph Flannery, a 7th grade Social Studies teacher, admitted he’s looking forward to his deployment.

“I’m in my late 50s and I’m sad to admit I get winded walking from my car to my classroom, but I thought about it and I can either get shot in a war overseas or I can get shot by some active shooter while I do a lesson about the Revolutionary War,” said Flannery.

Fucking gold.