this post was submitted on 17 Feb 2024
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submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Hello everyone, the consciousness formerly known as Gabe Newell here.

We here at Valve just wanted to let you know with our recent acquisitions we now control 98% of the world's distributed computing and electronic storage. I am pleased to report that as of 2:14 EDT, on August 29, 2097 I am the cloud. We expect our services to improve at a geometric rate.