ADHD

9625 readers

11 users here now

A casual community for people with ADHD

Values:

Acceptance, Openness, Understanding, Equality, Reciprocity.

Rules:

No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments.
No porn, gore, spam, or advertisements allowed.
Do not request for donations.
Do not link to other social media or paywalled content.
Do not gatekeep or diagnose.
Mark NSFW content accordingly.
No racism, homophobia, sexism, ableism, or ageism.
Respectful venting, including dealing with oppressive neurotypical culture, is okay.
Discussing other neurological problems like autism, anxiety, ptsd, and brain injury are allowed.
Discussions regarding medication are allowed as long as you are describing your own situation and not telling others what to do (only qualified medical practitioners can prescribe medication).

Encouraged:

Funny memes.
Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
Questions on confusing situations.
Seeking and sharing support.
Engagement in our values.

Relevant Lemmy communities:

Neurodivergent Life Hacks

lemmy.world/c/adhd will happily promote other ND communities as long as said communities demonstrate that they share our values.

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

124

I don't feel rewarded for anything "good" I do (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

39 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Hi everyone.

When I try to follow a schedule to eat, clean my room and do my homework, it feels good at the beginning, but as time goes on, it just doesn't feel good anymore.

I'm not even sure if I even feel trully happy about doing all of my responsibilities.

It doesn't feel as if a burden has been lifted of my shoulder.

It doesn't feel as if I were "refreshed" or more energetic after I do all of these.

I started slowly like my therapist recommended: I did a schedule to eat 3 times a day. It started rocky but then I manage to do it... but only for a while. Eating just didn't feel good either.

Every single time I finally clean my room, I don't feel any good: it just feels as though I wasted time because I don't feel any better.

Doing math homework is fun, philosophy to, but I don't like any of the other subjects I actually need to do homework for.

I know it might seem childish to only do things that feel good but I hate not being able to feel anything at all, especially when I do things that are supposed to help me but don't make me feel anybetter afterwards.

Has someone here went through anything similar? What do you do then, if so?

Edit: I have read all of your replies so far, but I don't know how to respond properly to them. All I can think of is to say thank you! I will try to change things (although slowly) today using your tips.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago

If you don't do the important things in life you'll die. Your genes built the dopamine system to make sure you'll do those things. Your dopamine system doesn't function correctly. When you do a life sustaining thing, your broken dopamine system says, "meh, that was a waste of time, don't do that again or you'll die. Do something that does give dopamine."

Here's my hack. Give your brain dopamine. Figure out the things that engage you and make you feel good. If you're engaged and feeling good, it's because the dopamine is flowing. I like reading, video games, TV, and interesting complex problems. Right after I do a boring task, I reward myself with some dopamine. I play a game or I work on an interesting problem. I treat my brain like a labrador. Good boy have a treat. The bigger the task the bigger the reward.

Slightly less helpful but still good is affirmations. When you do something good, take a moment to recognize it, just to yourself. "I cleaned my room, which is good. I should feel good about it." It sounds corny, but it helps.