this post was submitted on 19 Jan 2024
762 points (97.9% liked)
The Onion
4450 readers
444 users here now
The Onion
A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.
Great Satire Writing:
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
If you skinned and sold squirrels at a rate of 7.56 squirrels per second, you'd reach his wealth in just 100 years! All it takes is a little hard work!
They'd also go extinct after 1 year. Maybe switch to rats.
Probably gone even faster as wouldn't you need a lot more rats to equal what you could get from a squirrel?
You could alternate between rats and squirrels to allow repopulation
Rats don't have bushy tails, so you'd lose most of the value.
Even if you don't end up rich, eradicating squirrels is a pretty good consolation prize.