Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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If the VPS allows email ports to be open.
Then deal with your email going to spam most of the time because you’re domain/IP is so new and not “warmed up” that email systems think it’s all spam.
Yeah, it seems like the latter option is the obvious answer. It's an awful lot of work you still have to pay for. I'd rather just pay someone to offer me secure email and not harvest my information.
In my experience, this is nothing more than an urban legend at this point. There are great standards, like DMARC, DKIM, SPF, proper reverse DNS and more, that are much more reliable and are actually used by major mail servers. Pick a free service that scans the publicly visible parts of your email server and one that accepts an email that you send to them and generates a report. Make sure all checks are green. After an initial day of two of getting it right, I've never had trouble with any provider accepting mail and the ongoing maintenance is very low.
Milage may vary with an unknown domain and large email volumes or suspicious contents, though.
There are literally RBLs in use by many major mail providers that just contain all dynamic IPs. There are others that block entire subnets used by VPSs at certain hosters. In neither of those you can remove your IP yourself (unlike the ones that list individual IPs because of that IP's reputation).
Weird, I've never had problems over the past 15 years or so and I've been using VPS servers exclusively. Maybe my providers were reputable enough.
I realize my evidence is only anecdotal, but that's why I started "in my experience". Also, common blacklists are checked by the services I mentioned.
For what it’s worth I also haven’t had any problems. Maybe we’re just lucky, though.