An oldie, but a goodie
this post was submitted on 07 Dec 2023
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Your example is from one of this industries notorious for being toxic -- that doesn't make it right.
"Why would you think that's even remotely acceptable? Now I have to go apologize and possible comp a meal." Depending on the circumstance: take them off that table, send them home, or fire them. Being in control of themselves is one of the defining aspects of leadership, and being abusive is the sign a "leader" that isn't.
If they start being a dick: sure, game on -- so long as you're not demeaning yourself doing it. But most people are capable of a degree of self reflection and accountability once you make the situation clear to them, and they deserve that chance. Sometimes people don't even realize they're the ones that screwed up, even when it's obvious to everyone else.
There's it again. What, precisely, is it that makes Linus' comment "abusive"? Is he gaslighting? Is he attacking Mauro over what he is? All I see is calling out, harshly, what Mauro did, behaviour that actually occurred and that is not acceptable and that Mauro knows is not acceptable. "We do not break userspace" is the rule #1 of Linux development, Mauro ignored it and was a dick about it.
Or do you disagree with the tone of the whole thing. Things like "Shut up" instead of "This is not up for discussion". If so, then please for the love of the gods please shut up.