this post was submitted on 10 Nov 2023
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I downvoted and You asked for the why and here it is: I'm also programmer and I have experienced aggressive behavior both, from women to men and the other way around but only between those that were close to each other (friends). I have never experienced the same behavior between colleagues that were not familiar to each other and also not from supervisors to lower grades.
I know that my experiences are just mine and others may have made others so the downvote is because You're assuming there's a structual problem where there is just your own personal experience. To round it up, I have not much respect for ppl who direct themselves to the victim role.
Hey thanks for responding!
In my case, it wasn’t an assumption of a structural problem, and I’d counter you may be assuming it was. *
This was like a year into my position and that asshole was a contractor who had no issues with male supervisors, but had documented issues with women. Part of the reason I was put in charge of the project was because the previous (also female) PM had quit after several incidents that had her crying in the toilet after meetings with that guy, and I was considered strong enough to handle him.
I know what he was doing and why. That was the worst – and arguably the most unfair – situation of my professional career, but there were others milder but no less unfair.
I appreciate your response, but honestly it feels like you’re assuming more than me here.
e: * sentence structure
Props to you both for airing out in an adult manner.