weirdway

So because I'm already inevitably going to achieve it, now the question for me becomes "what if I can achieve it right now?"

Then this for me becomes, "If such and such transformation happened right in front of my face, how would I feel about it? Could I accept it and live with it?"

That's the one thing I've seen repeatedly in my life. When transformations pass a certain degree of subjective impressiveness, there is something in me that would reject them and basically not be OK with them. That "something" (a certain way of thinking and relating to experience, a certain way of expecting certain features from my experience, a habit of whatever is familiar, etc.) is softening up slowly and gradually. I feel like I am less tripped out by the "strange" than before, but it's still a step from that to having the strange appear in your name and taking responsibility for it too, and then not going back to the habit of trying to resolve it from many different perspectives, because otherwise, it's like there is still a memory of an old-style world in my mind and it's as if none of this "new" stuff even happened in that old world and the old world perspectives have to accept the new stuff, which of course they cannot, so it cannot be. So letting go or loosening up around the old world (the world from one's memories, how it used to be, which is how I knew that it used to be), and the entire external perspective game, is essential too.

And ultimately all this slogging and struggle to reach the pinnacle will eventually result in reaching that pinnacle, it won't be any other way.

Even if such efforts do not immediately in themselves reach fruition, they create the necessary supporting conditions for further efforts which then would reach it. So nothing is ever wasted.

The only way to slow oneself down is to go on a tangent somewhere. But tangents can have their own advantages. It's like taking a scenic route. It might not be the fastest, but you get to see more on the way and when you arrive, you have a bigger experienced context from your journey if you had taken a more scenic route.

Originally commented by u/mindseal on 2017-09-15 15:18:22 (dn13wjr)