this post was submitted on 19 Sep 2023
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Atheism
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Umm... what the hell do I do? What's a mandrake?!
Random Verse Generator, who's next?
ETA: I googled
Yeah, I'm goin' to jail.
Acts 16:3
oof, jail it is.
Exodus 35:3 Passage: "Do not light a fire in any of your dwellings on the Sabbath day."
Well, not jail at least.
I got Acts 13:10
Wtf am I supposed to do with that information
Sounds like a free pass to me. God hates you already so just fucking have at.
Leviticus 19:21
Passage: The man, however, must bring a ram to the entrance to the tent of meeting for a guilt offering to the LORD.
Sounds like you will have to apologize for problems at work that you cause with livestock.
It could mean you need to steal your neighbor's truck.
Steal the neighbor's truck to apologize for the first thing, then say sorry to the neighbor by giving them livestock.
Psalms 80:3 Passage: Restore us, O God; make your face shine on us, that we may be saved.
Guess I have good chances of winning
Isaiah 5:22 Passage: Woe to those who are heroes at drinking wine and champions at mixing drinks.
God in a night out: I fucking love you guys and I fucking love the bartender!
Bible writers: Woe to those who are heroes at drinking wine and champions at mixing drinks.
Woe, is me!
First one that's am actual command:
Psalms 136:3 Passage: Give thanks to the Lord of lords: His love endures forever.
His love endures forever while your pathetic body crumbles
Joel 3:8 Passage: I will sell your sons and daughters to the people of Judah, and they will sell them to the Sabeans, a nation far away." The LORD has spoken."
So I need to get some slaves and sell them I guess
Ok, I'm fine till winter
It's genocidin' time!
1 John 2:17
I live to see another day