this post was submitted on 02 Sep 2023
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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 11 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
 

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

From what I've observed, all too often curiosity about trans people (which comes from a place of ignorance) regularly is misread as transphobia (especially when the curiosity is worded in accidentally transphobic ways - a lot of cis people with little knowledge of trans people genuinely don't have the right vocabulary, and that gets misinterpreted as transphobic rather than just a lack of knowledge). Questions about trans lives regularly get a hostile "it's not my job to educate ignorant people, they should Google it" response. If @[email protected] had responded to their wife's cousin with an angry "it's not my job to educate you!", the result would likely not have been as positive as the conversation they had.

I always approach questions about trans stuff with an initial assumption that it's made in good faith and comes from a place of curiosity. Those acting in bad faith reveal themselves pretty quickly, in which case I shut the conversation down. But more often than not, people are ignorant but curious, rather than malicious and hateful. So I absolutely agree with t3rmit3 on that front. Very little beats the human touch of having a real conversation with someone.