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LGBTQIAPDSMFC2..... at some point you've got to consider the cut off otherwise you might as well write out the whole alphabet.
Queer is good to me as there's a difference between "Ben is queer" and "Ben is a queer"
I liked the MOGAI acronym since by nature it includes all of them but Queer also works as well.
QUILTBAG gets pretty good coverage too. Easy to say and cute, too.
(Queer, qUestioning, Intersex, Lesbian, Transgender, Bisexual, Asexual/Agender, Gay)
I never heard that one before, cool.
I mean going on your second point, I think it demonstrates the difference between a slur and a descriptor is how it's used as a word.
Like transgender is neutral term but we see it becoming a scare word by fascists recently by changing how its used in speech. Like "transgendered", "transgenderism" or "transing" (as a note, it's kinda scary how the first two no longer set off window's spellcheck). Basically turning trans as a state of being adjective into a verb makes it seem like an act you can do to someone or have happen to you.