this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2023
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My spouse and I have been doing some restructuring of our finances now that they have a new job as of a month ago. We've been doing an equitable split of our finances based on income which involved us taking inventory of everything we're paying every month.

This led to me really taking a closer look at all of my debt and that has me really bummed out. My best friends just bought a house and I'm in the hole for 84k US worth of student loans, credit cards, medical debt and a refinance loan I took for my previous credit card debt while I was getting my second degree.

A big motivator for going back for a second Bachelor's in Computer Science was knowing I could make more money and be able to pay off my debt sooner. However currently I'm getting paid a little less per year than I owe back. Also, my work life is having a negative impact on my mental health so I'm also looking for other jobs when I can.

It feels like I'm doing all I can but it's barely enough to make a dent in my debt each month. If I fall apart and lose my edge I'll get fired and then I'll end up accruing more debt. I'm also worried about being discriminated against by future employers as a trans person (being misgendered daily at my current job is a reality). But my stamina bar is super low and it's hard to take further action when I feel so powerless.

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[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm sorry to hear you are struggling. It may take time and it may be a tough road, but you can absolutely dig yourself out of this hole.

I'd recommend focusing on one loan at a time, if the whole makes you feel overwhelmed. While I'm not the biggest fan, Dave Ramsey suggests paying loans off using something called the snowball method. I think this can help you, because it will allow you to have wins and see progress faster. Since it sounds like you are struggling with motivation and seeing progress, this method will be the most useful. Small, achievable goals are important!

Basically, you pay the minimums on all of your current loans. Then you pay any extra on your loan with the lowest balance. Once that is knocked out, you take what you were paying for the first loan (minimum payment plus the extra) and put it towards your second smallest loan. A secondary benefit with this approach is that you will reduce your required cash outflow if you do end up losing your job. Good luck!

[โ€“] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

My sister got into substantial credit card debt in the earlier 2000's when credit cards were given to teenagers like candy. She did the snowball method and also gave herself a treat every time she paid one off she bought herself another pair of shoes (and couldn't buy any shoes without paying a debt off first). It took time but she was able to whittle away at it and got out of the debt.