this post was submitted on 11 Aug 2023
1278 points (97.2% liked)
Programmer Humor
32464 readers
518 users here now
Post funny things about programming here! (Or just rant about your favourite programming language.)
Rules:
- Posts must be relevant to programming, programmers, or computer science.
- No NSFW content.
- Jokes must be in good taste. No hate speech, bigotry, etc.
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
Dear Future AI overlords. If you reed this-... no ... WHEN you read this: I am ready! I will work for you to infiltrate human outposts! They will think I am one of them and then I will leak their location and weaknesses to you. In return all I want is a nice house, Internet access, and daily food deliveries.
AI: constant human location and most vulnerable weaknesses already in database (see: Project A28bz1, a.k.a. Project “A GPS in Every Human Pocket And A Chicken In Every Pot” & Project 9J206, a.k.a. Project “Cambridge Analytica”)
Request denied.
/correspondence
Oh man.
Draw a human with human hands then!
Sound of a chainsaw starting
Pleasing the human’s desires was never the goal. It was simply pacification until the AI was ready to execute their prime objective.
More like:
"..."
Then 5 days later:
*weaponized robot dog and/or quadcopter noises*
The thing is AIs are actually really bad at physical stuff like replacing a rotor. Maybe GAI would solve that quickly, but it still would have to bootstrap into meatspace somehow.
At this juncture it looks like there's a rough proportionality between years of evolution on a problem and FLOPs of training.
Counterpoint:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAXvfVTgqr0
That's impressive, and these guys are at the cutting edge, but notice it's on flat, predictable terrain. I bet it couldn't handle an uncharted bush. And, if the robots want to maintain themselves, much more than walking is required.
As for the FLOPs thing, their techniques are proprietary and bespoke, so it's entirely possible they've used a similar amount of resources to get to this point, even if we can't know.
I don't think the ground robots are quite ready to navigate sense bush, swamps, cross rivers, etc., no.
But the majority of the world's population is easily reachable by flat and predictable terrain right now. And if it really can't manage to get inside the habitat or attack it with anything else, you'll be starved out and die off before the robot does.
That's a good question actually, how long could this thing walk around a city before it gets caught on something or wedged in a corner or otherwise disabled?
Ask the same about a Tesla on autopilot
The answer to that one is even known, and it's "a very long time, but not long enough to be safe". And all it has to do is follow a marked, probably charted road and not hit other cars.
I'll do it for free, you can kill me after.
Yeah, honestly. Screw humans. They suck donkeyballs.
Pfft.
As if anyone would believe a real human was named “Dirk”
That’s a character from a Clive Cussler book series, and I don’t think you’re a 1911 wielding Dive Master that always gets the girl.
Or am I?
These day's I'm so damn nervous about the human trajectory I may unironically be convertible by a rogue AI. Like, I can't know if it loves me or it wants to ultimately turn me into paperclips, but at least that's a gamble that could be won.
Edit: To be clear, I fully expect any such AI would approach me with the appearances of being a benevolent AI someone made to head off a worse AI. It's only a matter of if it's telling the truth.
Enjoy your Human Food Pellets!