this post was submitted on 23 May 2025
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Helicopters leave the ground because God has gazed upon them, and became angered when He saw them among His beasts, on the lands of His creation. God then decided to expel the helicopters from His earthly kingdom to flutter helplessly in His skies. God did this to punish Man, whose hubris led him to climb into the unholy creation. The Lord would then strike down the abomination fluttering in His skies, condemning the heretics that had climbed aboard in the belief that they could fool Him.
Thus the name "Jesus nut".
No, it's called the Jesus nut because if it fails, only Jesus can save you now.