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How does the great void of death not disturb you? (self.exchristian)

submitted 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) by Flagstaff to c/[email protected]

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Or does it?

I know we were once nothing, but it is still terrifying and depressing to me to think about returning to this. In fact, as of late, I've been unable to not think about it: the loss of all experience and all memories of everything, forever. All the good times we had, and will have, with anyone or anything ever will totally annihilate into nothingness. All our efforts will amount to nothing because the thoughtless void is ultimately what awaits everything in the end.

The only argument against this would have to be supernatural, like another cause of the Big Bang or somehow proof of reincarnation, but if my consciousness won't exist for me to experience it, then what does it matter either way?

There is no comfort in Hell, either. The anvil of death weighing down, infinitely, on all values and passions is becoming unbearable for me, so I could really use any potentially helpful thoughts about this matter.

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[–] Flagstaff 2 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Oh, I'd already long shut out the concepts of H&H from my expectations, and I was previously Protestant and did not derive faith from works so I wasn't/haven't been doing good deeds for the sake of a personal reward anyway. That's why this:

because I don't believe there's an afterlife punishment or reward, it makes being the best person I can be all the more important.

... seems contradictory because the ultimate death of everything seems to reduce the importance of anything we do, which is what bugs me.

Anyway, my perspective doesn't really apply to people whose life situations have involved more suffering than enjoyment, like it sounds yours unfortunately has; I rather generally like my current life situation. I hope things improve for you, given how this seems like it's all we've got.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Maybe a simpler way to put it

You find a lost crying child in a mall. Do you help them find their parents, do you ignore them, or do you kick them over? In 100 years, it won't matter. No one's going to punish you for ignoring them. But, the choice you make matters a lot to the kid.

[–] Flagstaff 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Sure, that's fair. Call me brutal or cruel, though, but this whole existential crisis had me stepping back even further in scope than yours to: do the kid's feelings matter? Does the kid even matter in the first place?

Beyond evolutionary altruism and social norms, I can regrettably no longer seem to see anything other than just brain chemicals/feelings and anyone merely wanting or choosing to say "yes" to those, which is not wrong or bad, but the loss of the framework of any post-death existence to further support just treatment of others has just been unnerving to me.

Is there anything beyond these seemingly rudimentary drivers of motivation to support the stance of helping others or, to go even further out in scope, doing anything in particular at all, like even surviving? It doesn't seem like it. I continue to live because I currently want to play Slice & Dice, help others make friends in my neighborhood with events I offer to the public, etc., but that's it—there's no further basis. I just want to do it. I guess I feel like without an afterlife, we effectively plunge into our own hedonism, buttressed by personal morals—that still bow ultimately to each individual's sense of pleasure.

And I don't like that.

There were a lot of good ideas here, though, which have been helping. I'm not suicidal in any way—just rethinking the entire framework of motivation for why we bother to do what/anything that we do. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

It's interesting, because I see it as like

The world shapes us heavily, and we shape the world slightly. If I do my best to be kind and helpful, at least a very small amount of the time, those actions will lead to someone else doing the same. My individual actions might have a small impact relative to the world, but I'll leave it a little bit better than I found it. Or at least, a little bit better than if I hadn't existed at all.

To my mind, this is different than a legacy. No one, not even me, will ever truly know the effect I've had on the world. My actions aren't going down in history books. No one will remember me in 50 years. However, it doesn't matter. My positive effect on the world, however small, remains.