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You are literally describing narcissism. If they are incredibly important to you then you can hope they decide to pursue cognitive behavioral therapy but IRL you cannot make them fix this. Behavioral disorders are very hard to confront especially NPD because the person with it rarely sees the issue.
so this is just like textbook narcissism and not just an asshole?
Im not a shrink but it seems like it. Like I said if it isn't someone you are close to and have to have in your life I would move on.
If this is your actual problem rather than someone else then you need to talk with a therapist specializing in cognitive behavioral therapy. That road is long and difficult but you might end up happier after a few years.
she’s actually my “close friend” but I don’t consider her that for obvious reasons
Move on, people on the NPD spectrum don't understand theor problem and you cannot do that for them.
yeah, she either apologizes because she “can’t control herself” or blames me
The Narcissist's Prayer
That didn't happen. And if it did, it wasn't that bad. And if it was, that's not a big deal. And if it is, that's not my fault. And if it was, I didn't mean it. And if I did, you deserved it.
YES. This is how she behaves!!
Note if they are a teenager they might grow out of this. If you are 30 run for the fucking hills
i can be hopeful then, im a teen
They could outgrow it but if this is consistent at 19-20 it us unlikely to change but 13-18 yeah it might.
Only the pain of a loss, such as your company, could possibly jolt them into self reflection .
If you don’t leave you are getting hurt and hurting them as well.