this post was submitted on 12 Nov 2024
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Respect is granted for just being human. That can be erode if they violate core social norms, but when respect is given trust is given back. They then give the effort that results in learning.
respect for life is not respect for the individual.
trust must exist before respect is given. let me give you an example.
a cop pulls you over, you were not breaking any laws that you were aware of. the officer walks up and asks you if you know why you were pulled over. you tell him no and he proceeds to tell you that you were speeding.
you know this was a lie since you had speed control on.
did you respect the officer before or after he pulled you over?
did your level of respect change before or after he lied to you?
in my case, I never respected the officer. I understand that he's doing a job and will help however I can. However, after he lies to me I could never trust him, thus I could never respect him.
my point is, In order for respect to exist, trust must be present first. I don't trust strangers, even if they're in positions of public trust.
You are right though. Respect and trust correlate to each other and fortify each other. The more trust you have in someone, the more respect you have for them, the more respect you have for someone, the more trust you have in them.
I can still trust somebody, but I can still not respect them. that relationship cannot be flipped around.
Teenagers are in development of becoming an individual. They may behave personalities, but they haven't tempered them for society yet. That tempering process is through human connections. I'd argue the best outcomes come through respect, patient connections with adults who demonstrate composure and allow them to grow that composure.
I don't know what you're suggesting other than with holding respect.
that's exactly my point. I understand they have to be tempered by society. Once they have achieved this level of tempering it's respectable for the amount of effort they put in. some people though, never get through that tempering and I cannot respect them. I understand they may have social anxiety or some other reason, but I can't trust them like others that have so I can't respect them like others. there are other ways to respect though.
IMO that's not respect, thats understanding. If you respected them, you would at least seem them as equals to yourself and treat them as an equal. You understand they aren't at the same level as yourself and give them some leeway to "feel it out" and find their own path. this includes supporting them when they make mistakes or explaining how to avoid the mistakes in the future.
respect is a gift given from one individual to another. it signifies the trust one has in the other. A child respects a parent because they trust the parent. when the trust is broken, the respect dies with it. infact, respect of an adult is important to the development of a young mind and is a mechanism used to emulate the adult. if you respect someone, you might want to try being like them, even when you're an adult.
so in short, I disagree that respect should be given automatically. It's earned through nurturing relationships and built on trust.
I don't respect cops to begin with. If I didn't know they were a cop then I would respect them.
because you don't trust them, right?
I do not