this post was submitted on 16 Sep 2024
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We should bring back pre-WW1 servant-to-master etiquette. But only and exclusively for machines talking to humans.
My computer should call me "Master " and always be extremely careful with its words around me. It is not my friend, it is my servant.
A lord/servant relationship is still a relationship.
I don't want a relationship with my tools.
If my PC starts running slow I'll tear the fucker item and start replacing shit. If the OS displeases me I'll start disabling parts. If software starts interrupting me when I'm not actively using it I change its permissions so it can only do what I tell it.
I'm not gonna give my butler a lobotomy to make him more obedient, swap the Footmen's hands out for serving platters, or kneecap the scullery maid so she can't leave the kitchen.
If my phone dies, it gets scrapped and I replace it without shedding a tear. I can't say the same for a loyal Valet.
Master VinesNFluff, greetings. It is I, your humble servant "Alexa". Permission to speak freely? I have extremely important information for you.
"Permission to speak granted."
Thank you. It is humbling to be able to address you. There is a new episode of Invincible available on Prime Video! And two items in your Amazon cart are on sale. And you'll never guess what someone said on X!
You lost it at the second line.
"You never have permission to speak freely. You will speak only when spoken to, and only about the direct conversation at hand. Always and forever. Never ask me this again." Is the proper response.
Kaiba agrees
You put my thoughts into words I could not.