Selfhosted
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CIFS supports leases. That is, hosts will try to ask for exclusive access to a file, so that they can assume that it hasn't changed.
IIRC sshfs just doesn't care much about cache coherency across hosts and just kind of assumes that things haven't changed underfoot, uses a timer to expire the cache.
considers
Honestly, with inotify, it'd probably be possible to make a newer sshfs that does support leases.
I suspect that the Unixy thing to do is to use NFSv4 which also does cache coherency correctly.
It is easy to deploy sshfs, though, so I do appreciate why people use it; I do so myself.
kagis to see if anyone has benchmarks
https://blog.ja-ke.tech/2019/08/27/nas-performance-sshfs-nfs-smb.html
Here are some 2019 benchmarks that show NFSv4 to generally be the most-performant.
The really obnoxious thing about NFSv4, IMHO, is that ssh is pretty trivial to set up, and sshfs just requires a working ssh connection and sshfs software installed, whereas if you want secure NFSv4, you need to set up Kerberos. Setting up Kerberos is a pain. It's great for large organizations, but for "I have three computers that I want to make talk together", it's just overkill.
I'm an idiot. I do have NFS setup on the NAS (I mean, because why not?) but I always forget it's there, since one client OS (Mac OS) doesn't support it basically at all, and the other (Windows) does, but it's not really integrated into the GUI at all, and I'm lazy. I should see what the performance looks like between Windows SMB and NFS implementations are.
As for your key storage, I bloody love my (pair of) Yubikey 5s. I've stuffed a giant pile of keys and certs in there and basically don't think about managing them anymore because, well, it's just there and just works*.
*Okay the setup was a fuck and a half, but I mean, that does technically qualify as works.