this post was submitted on 28 Aug 2024
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What if the dm words it like: "you appear to be in a privy. You notice a hole in the wall."?
I've already put more thought into this than I'm comfortable with.
That only clears the first hurdle. It only lets the player recognise it as a gloryhole. But if you were to give someone a fleshlight in a public place, do you honestly expect them to use it right there? Or to even accept the fleshlight? Same applies with a gloryhole in a ttrpg. Even were they inclined, there are other people there.
And if everyone there is down for it, you're now the asshole ruining everyone's fun by putting chili in the fleshlight.
The DM clearly had a fantasy of the bard engaging in some perverted act, then thought of a way to punish the bard for the DM's fantasies, and is now presenting it before the table and thinking it makes the bard look bad.
To be fair, what if the bard is like, "I try putting my dick in it" at every session? Even if the group is generally okay with explicit roleplay, it could eventually get a bit old, and the DM could simply be trying to reduce the frequency of the dick jokes in a creative way.
Then use your words and say "dude, stop" or "could you maybe turn it down?" If the DM let it go on and never did anything to stop it, then it's the DM's fault it got as far as it did. Just because someone else is a villain in the story doesn't mean you're not.
And this is in the hypothetical situation that the bard is the specific strange kind of person who learns of a possible gloryhole in a TTRPG and uses it without question.
All I see is a DM making a castration joke, which is a dick joke but more gruesome, while blaming a player for a situation entirely within the DM's power to stop by any number of peaceful, less disruptive means. They could have spoken to them, but they chose to cut off their dick.
Yeah, I was trying to be way more charitable in my interpretation than I should have been.